Payback's a B-
by BlueElli
Summary: Back by demand!! Elli and Billie are trying to get back to the SW Universe when something backlashes...and Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, and Mace are slapped into OUR Universe! Chaos quickly insues... and let's just say, Payback's a B- Sequel to Different Reality.
1. Ch 1 Unexpected Visit

**Title: Payback's a B-**

**Author(S): BlueElli and Billie**

**Disclaimer: Of course we don't own Star Wars or any of the characters from the movies, books, etc. This is just for fun (and boy is it fun) there's no profit made here.**

**Summary: 3 weeks after the whole escapade with Billie Ladnier and Elli Cartier getting whipped into the SW Universe something back lashes as they're back home…Let's just say Payback's a B-…**

**Series: Dunno..this is just a sequel to Different Reality**

**Feedback/Reviews: OF COURSE! This is, again, a second story so the updates will be pending on amount of reviews and how much everyone likes it. Hope you do!**

**Know: ~~~~ is change of scene from another one at the same time when it isn't between Billie and I. **** is change of time. Italics are personal thoughts. And beware…we are even more insane in this one than the last! Consider yourselves warned!**

**Note: Thanks to everyone who reviewed Different Reality! This is for you guys! ****We know this chapter isn't all that great. Don't worry! These chapters, after this one, will get much funnier! And most of the chapters will be like really long too. Yay, nay? Happy ****Reading****!**

**Ch.**** 1 Payback's a B-**

_Ahh…Nice warm covers. It's only __5:30__ in the morning, I have three hours left of sleep at least.. Life is good on moments as these. No little brother to pester me. No parents home for the next week, thank God for traveling jobs! And school is out. Life is sweet…_

Shifting, to become even MORE comfortable, I pulled my covers up to my nose and opened my eyes. No sounds of people. Sweet. 

I frowned thinking of the night before. Billie had come over and once again, we had tried to figure out a way to get back to the Star Wars Universe. Since our little expedition nearly 3 weeks ago I'd watched every Star Wars movie again and again, more so than I normally would, just looking for something we could use to get back.

_3 weeks of trying, and 3 weeks of no luck.__ What's that Master Yoda says? Do or do not, there is no try. Great advice Yoda, put me down some more. At any rate, Billie and I finally just decided it wasn't possible. That last time it was just a fluke and it couldn't happen again. As a sign of surrender I tossed my silver watch, that had been our key to get back home last time, into the fire and let it roast. Poor lil' bugger._

With a sigh I threw my covers off and got up. I'm one of those people who no matter what horrible hour they wake, they can never go back to sleep. 

I walked past the guest room door and nearly banged on it then thought better of it. Billie was in her death sleep right now and not to mention we had hours till we actually had to start getting ready. 

With a shrug I went down stairs, grabbing my robe off the hook next to the bathroom and slid it on. Obi, my miniature pincher (my brother named him!..I just didn't object to it lol!) ran from the living room to me. 

"Oh, right.." I murmured and went to the porch. In there were my two larger dogs, Jed and Doc. Jed was a german shepard and Doc was a husky. They both got up wagging their tales and barking.

"Shh…Billie's asleep." I whispered but gave them both a pat anyway. Opening the door I froze. The dogs didn't even go outside. All of us were watching the huge mob coming down the street at this hour in the morning. 

With a frown I pushed the dogs back and went outside standing in my driveway as the mob neared. They were all screaming names, some were even in their night clothes still! As they neared I nearly hurled. Infront of that mob of obsessed people, running with very terrified expressions was Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor…But as they came even closer I realized what it was they were wearing, tunics…Jedi tunics.. Neeson's hair was long, not short. He had a beard too.. And McGregor looked younger…and he had a braid flying behind him.

"Oh you've got to be joking…." I murmured thinking of what we did last night. Nothing in particular…but Billie had said, _"Maybe they'll come here." As I threw the watch in the fire. _

"Marry Me Ewan!!!" Someone yelled as they ran right past my house. The mob took a few moments to pass but as they did it looked like a herd of elephants.

"That can't be good…" I murmured. The dogs whimpered and laid down again as I ran back inside.

"BILLIE! GET UP!" I screamed running up the stairs. Nearly breaking the door down I burst into the room. "UP! NOW!" 

Billie blinked sleepily. "What?"

"Get up now. Dressed now!" I told her. 

"Why?" She asked looking at the clock. 

"Evil Long Hair and Braided One decided to come for a visit." I told her.

She flew up in the bed at this.

"WHAT?!" 

"Hurry up!" I shouted running back to my room.

*******

With my keys in my mouth and hopping towards my car trying to put my boot on I was nearly panicking. 

"What are we going to do?" Billie asked putting her jacket on.

"Got your phone?" I asked taking my keys out of my mouth.

"Yeah."

"Good. Take your car, turn on the radio station and head to where mob sitings are." I told her opening my door.

"Are you crazy?!" She shouted.

"Go Billie!" I yelled closing my door and starting the car.

Billie groaned and ran to her car on the side of the rode. 

Shifting I screamed out of the driveway…even faster than Billie does. I stopped next to her and rolled down the window.

"Go that way, I'll go here." I told her pointing the way the mob had come from and the way it went for me.

"Right…Elli? What happens when we find them?" Billie asked revving the car's engine.

"Just get them in the car and bring them back here. Turn your phone on." I told her squeeling away.

**Billie:**

_Ooooo, she was nuts! What were we supposed to do?! They could be anywhere by now! How the hell did they get here anyway?_

Turning on the radio the first thing I heard was the guy saying, "Seems we have a few celebraties in town here. It was heard that mobs were running down the streets early this morning chasing Star Wars stars Liam Neeson, Ewan McGregor, and Samual L. Jackson."

"Great Baldy?!" I shouted to no one. Elli didn't see him.

"McGregor and Neason were last on Oak Drive in the Leaf Wood Community." 

_That's here..Elli should find them.._

"Jackson was last seen running toward Mccullan Rd in East St. Paul."

"East St. Paul?! What are you doing there you idiot?!" I shouted doing a U-ie. Glad not many people were on the road.

**Elli:**

_I didn't know my car went this fast!!! Wow! This is exciting! Oo, stay on task Elli._

I shrieked to a stop at a four section looking all ways. Dust still hadn't settled down one road. U-ing down that road I figured Mr. Ethin would definitely be telling my parents about how I 'drove recklessly around the neighborhood' again… oh well. 

"AH HA!" I yelled to my own pleasure. The mob of people were still running after the guys up front. I figured if anyone wasn't awake by their screaming then they were about to be.. 

"HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!" 

Needless to say, I laid it down on the horn. A path was quickly made. Veering to the side I circled around Evil Long Hair and Braided One stopping infront of them. _Wow, I'm a damn good driver!_

"Get in the car!"

"The what?" Braided One asked but then someone yelled.

"Come back to me Lover!"

He quickly hit action and jumped in quickly followed by Evil Long Hair. Before he was even closing the door we had to speed off before the mob swamped us.

"Hey! They're getting away!" A few people yelled.

"Get the cars!" Others yelled and they scattered.

"Uh-Oh…" I murmured looking my rear-view mirror.

"Red?" Evil Long Hair asked shocked.

"The one and only." I told him screaming around a corner trying to get out of the neighborhood before they blocked us in.

"It's been years!" Braided One said.

I looked at him in the mirror. Oh..Yeah, he was a bit older. Too busy with my own surprise I nearly ran into the car blocking the road.

"Step away from the car Elli Cartier! You can't save them!" A woman yelled. How did she know my name?

"Yeah Elli!" Melissa Barton shouted from in the car. Oh that's why. I hated that girl.

"Ummm…" I said looking behind us. "Seat belts?"

**Billie:**

"Oooo, shit!" I screamed making a very slim cut between a semi and another truck. The truck honked angerly.

"I know, I know!" I yelled speeding down the high way. Great Baldy better not hate me after this. If I banged up this car my parents were SO going to kill me and never get me another one. 

Swerving down into the exit I made sure to test if _The Fast and The Furious were accurate with their cars…Let's see if a Civic really would go that fast…Now if I had my mustang a month ago I'd be there in a heart beat…Elli had a Cougar, she had no problem either._

"AHHH!!" I screamed slamming on the breaks as someone dashed out infront of me. I slowed considerably but I still hit the person off their feet. Freezing I looked over the steering wheel…then looked down the tunnel road seeing a very angry looking mob.

"ooooo…Great Baldy.." I murmured opening the car door, sourly it connected with something and a loud groan let out.

"Are you ok?!" I asked shocked.

"Noo…No..Don't tell me that's who I think it is…" Great Baldy said as I leaned over him.

"Am I dead…Did I go to hell?" He asked.

"Hurry up or we're both going to die. Up. Uppidy, up, up." I said helping him up. He was wobbly so I kinda just dragged him over to the passanger's side and shoved him in...At least I closed the door. Running around the back I jumped in my open door and shifted us out of park and slammed on the gas.

"AH!" Great Baldy groaned slamming into his seat.

"This is another one of those nightmares…this can't be real.." He murmured. 

I pinched him. 

"OW!"

"Are you awake now?!" I shouted.

"Stop Yelling! Look out!" He shouted back pointing at the truck that pulled out infront of us. I swerved and accidently went into the next lane of traffic…the one coming _towards us._

"SHIT BALLS!" I screamed veering away from the next angry driver who was _politely flipping me off._

"What are you doing?!" Great Baldy questioned.

"I'm saving your ass!" I screamed then gunning it while jerking the wheel to the side doing an effective 360..wow it helps to have a brother in the racing biz. 

Great Baldy continued his fit of mad screams as we did so and covered his eyes with his arms leaning back in his seat. Jamming us back into the right position we flew along the old highway. Thank God rush hour hadn't hit yet.

**Elli:**

_Alright, that's it. I'm doing a ' Billie'._

"Hang on." I said putting us in reverse and slamming the gas down while turning in my seat to look back. We squeeled into Mr. and Mrs. Taylor's drive way.

"Sorry!" I yelled as Mr. Taylor ran out onto his porch.

"What are you doing?!" Evil Long Hair and Braided One shouted as I gunned it out of the drive way back into the road, just the other way.

"Trying to live till my 17th birthday! And it's tomorrow!" I yelled back caught up in all the yelling stuff. 

"Well I want to see my 21st  and it's not for another 10 months, so would you slow down!" Braided One said.

"Red!" Evil Long Hair shouted as two cars came out of the next street. 

"Oh I hate you Melissa Barton!" I yelled knowing it was her and her witchy mother. 

"Stop yelling at her and get us out of here!" Evil Long Hair demanded. 

"I'm Working On IT!" I said as we whipped around the next corner. Braided One toppled over in the back seat.

"What did I say about seat belts?!" 

"OW!" He exclaimed as we weaved around another one.

"You're going to kill us!" Evil Long Hair said. At that I turned sharper on the next one and he was slammed into the window.

"I'm Driving Here!" I told him. 

Finally we came to the main road and screamed out of the neighborhood blowing through early morning traffic. I pulled into the parking lot of _Blockbuster Video. It was closed of course and I was glad. All three of us just sat there in silence. Then my phone rang._

"AHHHHHH!" I shouted then realized what it was and picked it up from between Evil Long Hair's seat and the counsel.

"Elli." I answered.

"Did you get them?!" 

I think Qui-Gon could have heard that…heck Melissa Barton could have heard that she was so loud.

"Yeah. Where are you?...And what is that noise?" I said. "Wait hold on." I slid the phone in the holder and pressed from handless. "Ok, spill it." 

"I'm with Great Baldy and we're heading back to your place…and that noise is him SCREAMING AT ME!" She replied. Braided One and Evil Long Hair winced.

"No! Don't go back to my place…mob is there."

"Where are we going to met up at?"

"Get me out of here!" Great Baldy's voice demanded.

"Hey doors are locked buddy!" Billie said muffled.

"Meet at…Meet us at Denny's."

"Denny's?" Evil Long Hair questioned. I nodded to him.

"Alright."

"Oh, and put a hat and sunglasses on Great Baldy. No more mobs this morning." I added quickly.

"K, meet you there." Billie said and ended the phone line.

"Where are we going?" Braided One asked.

"To breakfast…and to figure out how the hell you guys got here and what we're going to do about it." I told him looking in the mirror at him.

"What's Denny's?" Evil Long Hair asked.

I looked at him, "Oh, you boys have a lot to learn if you're going to survive around here." I told him gunning it from the red light.

"Just don't kill us before we get there." Evil Long Hair said tensing as we passed a few people.

"Got your seat belt on?"

Tbc….

Well? Was it ok? We know it wasn't all that great but trust me…it will get better! Heh, we have big plans this time..mwhahahaha!

**As always, this is a 2nd story for me and update will depend on Reviews! So you know what that means, if you want more, Review!!!!!! **

Love all!

Till Later,

Billie&Elli


	2. Ch 2 Mobs, Snoopy, and Log Chutes

 **__**

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Thank you guys so much! We would have uppied sooner but a) FF.net decided to break B) We had to wait for everyone to slow down a bit. It was like everyone posted at one time! Lol. Enjoy! This chapter is interesting to say the least…lol, and VERY LONG! We know it's not all that wonderful or funny, but bare with us, we've been trying to think of 'trouble' we could get into. LOL! Enjoy!

**Ch.**** 2 Payback's a B-**

Denny's wasn't all that full. It still had something of a morning flow but not like it would be within a few hours, and I was thankful for it. I had put a hat and sunglasses on Qui-Gon, and a hat on Obi-Wan. We had waited in the car until Billie and Mace showed up. She had him in the same attire mostly.

"Ok, we're gonna go inside. If you guys think anyone's looking at you hungerly…say something and we'll make a run for it." I told them.

Qui-Gon, a.k.a Evil Long Hair, and Obi-Wan, aka Braided One, glanced at eachother and nodded.

"k, come on." I said getting out. 

Looked like Billie had give Mace, aka Great Baldy, the same warning as we met in the middle of the lot and walked inside with the three behind us. 

Inside I looked around and quickly spotted my prey. "Mike!" I called. 

Mike, a waiter at the diner, looked up at me and smiled. I'd known him since the first day I moved here, though he was older than me. He came over to us and frowned, "Who are your friends?"

"Just some guys…uhh…Could you get us the private room please?" I told him trying not to seem nervous.

"Umm…Suuurrreee." He told me motioning for us to follow.

Billie and I sighed relief and looked at the three to follow us. 

We waited for the door to close before we relaxed in the private dining area. 

"How in the hell did you guys get here?" Billie sighed.

"We have no idea…We're just lucky we ran into you two, those people looked murderous." Evil Long Hair told us.

Billie and I glanced at eachother and I leaned on the table. "What was the last thing you remember?"

"I was in mediation." Great Baldy said.

"We were both in the common." Braided One added.

"Then, it just seemed like we were here…With very strange people looking at us…In a very disturbing way." Evil Long Hair supplied.

"How long have you been here?" Billie asked.

"We've been running from those people nearly all night." Evil Long Hair said.

I groaned and slammed my head on the table. 

"What?" The three Jedi asked.

"I think I know why you're here…Or how you got here." I said muffled into the table.

"It was the watch. The watch that got us home last time, remember? We destroyed it last night…Billie just happened to say _maybe they'll come here." I told them glaring at Billie._

"So how are we supposed to get back?" Braided One asked.

"..Dunno..Let me think on it a while."

"A while?! We should have been back 8 hours ago!" Great Baldy erupted.

"Well, then you're late! Hey, and don't try and kill me this time, I'm the only thing between you and those people chasing you." Billie told him pointing at him.

Great Baldy tried to launch across the table but Evil Long Hair held him back. Billie grabbed her silverware and made an X with them.

"Guys! Please!" I shouted.

Silence….With a sigh I rubbed my temples and closed my eyes. This wasn't right…I had no idea how we were going to get them back. 

"Did you ever take those anger management classes I recommended?" Billie asked casually. Great Baldy's eyes nearly popped out of his head he was glaring at her so hard.

"Gee, never did get rid of that twitch there did ya?" Billie mentioned with a squint.

"Billie! I need your help, not your funeral!" I exclaimed.

"Sorry.." She said with a smile.

"Look, this is going to take hours, and I need to know everything that happened." I explained.

"Hours? Elli, have you forgotten? We have to be at competition in…" Billie looked at her watch. "4 hours. We have to be at the stables in an hour and a half. We can't just not go!" 

I whimpered and slammed my head on the table again making the silverware and glasses jingle.

"That may not be all the healthy." Braided One pointed out.

"_Tttthhhhaaannnkkkk youuuuu ****__Captain Obvious!" I told him looking at him then slamming my head on the table again._

"Well….We can't leave you guys anywhere, _they might find you. So…I guess you're just gonna have to come with us." I said finally._

"Come with us?! Are you crazy?!" Billie exclaimed. "Just what are we supposed to do with them while we're in the ring?!" 

"We'll just..." I thought a moment then smiled a little looking back to the three. "Time to saddle up boys." We were going to a horse riding competition.

The Jedi glanced at eachother, dread seeping into their every feature. Billie whimpered and slammed her head on the table.

"Ow…" She murmured.

**********

Of course, we very well couldn't bring them to _Diamond T wearing Jedi tunics, they'd just be considered freaks or something. _

At first we considered making them try on our fathers' clothes…Then decided against it. One reason was that the mob was probably still in my driveway, the other reason was that our fathers are built NOTHING like the three we were looking at. So…Our last option was obviously Mall Of America…Simple right? God help us…

"Are you sure this is such a good idea?" Billie asked beside me as we entered the leveled garage. 

"What else are we going to do? Strech out my dad's pant legs to fit Evil Long Hair and shrink your dad's to fit Braided One. What about Great Baldy?" I asked parking. We were lucky it was still rather early in the morning, the rush wasn't in yet. 

"I don't know…I just have a bad feeling about this."

"I have a bad feeling about this." Braided One said as we were whispering. I turned in my seat to face him after I turned the Coug of. 

"Don't say that, that's a bad omen. Bad things happen when you say that." I said.

"Strange….Bant and the others say that all the time.."

"Wonder why…" Billie murmured.

"Ok, we're going to go inside…If anyone is looking at you funny, like they're a cat ready to pounce or something, turn the other way. Got it?" 

"I think so…" Braided One said lowly for the three of them.

"What is this place anyway?" Great Baldy asked as we got out of the car. I pulled my seat up as Billie did to let them out.

"It's a mall. Certainly you have malls where you come from." Billie said looking at him oddly.

"Oh. Yes we have them." Great Baldy said realizing.

As we walked over the air walk I suddenly agreed with Billie and Braided One…I had a bad feeling about this.

We entered and everyone around us just stopped. It was like they were frozen. We kinda stared back at them for a while until I tugged Great Baldy's hat down further and pushed the three onward.

"Just ignore them, they'll get over it." Billie murmured as we fled.

Coming actually into the mall itself the three looked up all the levels. Evil Long Hair frowned when he stopped the inflated giant Snoopy.

"What is that?" He asked as we dragged them away from the entrance of the store we just left.

"It's a giant inflated dog, what does it look like?" Billie replied. 

I shot her a glance as we went to the elevator.

"Where are we going to get them clothes?" Billie asked as I pressed the close early button when someone was coming in.

"Uh…" I glanced at the three. "I don't know Ms. Fashion, you tell me." 

Billie looked them up and down critically. The three Jedi glanced at eachother with worried expressions…Not that a I blame them. Billie had that mad stylist look about her. At least I'm normal…I do the scientist, who ever heard of a mad Stylist?

The elevator stopped on the 3rd floor and we got out. I tried to glare away anyone who stood watching. This was going to be-

"Hey, are you Samual L. Jackson?" Someone asked pointing at Great Baldy. 

Bad..

"Yeah, and you're Ewan McGregor and Liam Neeson, I know you guys!" Someone else exclaimed. Suddenly everyone within a 100 foot primeter started advancing on us.

"Ummm…Now we run." I murmured. 

Billie spun around to the elevator again but the doors had closed and it was going down already.

"Stairs!" I shouted pushing the person closest to me, I think it was Evil Long Hair. 

Running down the stairs like banchies from hell with our little demon worshipers behind us we caused to gain the attention of those on the floors below us.

"Look!" People started yelling pointing at us as we jumped to the second level off the last four stairs.

"Keep going!" Billie shouted over the thunder of feet down the stairs and around us. 

Running down the next stair case we came to the HUGE bowl of Snoopy…The entrance to Camp Snoopy. 

Looking behind us I panicked. 

"Now what?!" Great Baldy demanded.

"Go!" Billie ordered pushing him as the mob began to catch up.

"Go that way!" I said pointing down one of the walk ways.

Suddenly Braided One cried out and we all  looked to him…Some lady had firmly attached herself to him from the side.

"Get off!"  He demanded spinning around with her frailing out in trail.

Before I realized it Billie had suddenly tackled the woman on him, they both tumbled to the ground.

"uh-oh…" I murmured.

"Go! Save yourself!!!!!!" Billie ordered as the mob began to close in.

"You bitch!" The Obsessed Tackler cried throwing herself at my little blonde friend.

"Run Evil Long Hair! Take them with you!" I yelled.

"Where?!"

"Go along the path until you get to a wooden like building!" I said plunging into the battle. Hope he listened cause we were about in the middle of the mob now. 

Evil Long Hair pushed the two along the path.

~~~~~~~

"We can't just leave them there Master! They'll be killed!" His padawan said still being pushed.

"I think they know what they're doing." Evil Long Hair replied as they came to the wooden building as Red had called it.

"They never know what they're doing!" Great Baldy exclaimed.

Evil Long Hair thought on this…It was true…But what were they going to do about it?

A cry came from the mob far behind them now and a splash. Someone was now in the Snoopy Bowl.

"I think I know.." He said as the two drew in.

**Billie:**

"Oh you skank!" I shouted clubbing the woman I had first started this little episode with with her own purse.

"Slut!"

"Whore!"

Elli and someone else were screaming back and forth at eachother. Wow, she was getting into it.

"Psyco!"

"Sycophant!"

The woman paused looking at her strangely. 

"What?!"

"Sycophant, a self seeking, servile flatter…You flatter me by calling me a psycho, because you see I'm a sociopath, not a psychopath…There's a difference, see a psychopath doesn't know the difference between right and wrong….A sociopath is a person who knows the difference…They just don't give a damn. At least now I have an excuse."

The woman was totally dumbfounded…This is what Elli wants, she's done it many times.

_BAM! _

See…Now the woman is on the ground, out cold, and in bliss from Elli's fist. Told ya.

At any rate, it was time to run, but everyone was closing in now.

Elli and I backed up till we bumped into eachother. In a vain attempt I threw the purse into the mob…They swallowed it. Gulping and whispered, "Now what Indiana?"

"I have no clue…Remember, except death in peace." She told me.

I wimpered and closed my eyes as someone reached out.

"Pardon me, was someone looking for me?" Opening one eye I looked at Braided One on one path to the right of us.

"Oh, it must have been you then." Evil Long Hair said from the path to his left.

"Did I hear my name?" Great Baldy said from the path to Evil Long Hair's left.

"They're insane." Elli murmured.

"They're angels." I whispered back.

Suddenly the crowd split in three different ways running after the three.

The Jedi then pulled out their little silver saber thingies…and nothing happened.

Braided One hit his hand against his and nothing happened.

"They don't work!" Great Baldy exclaimed.

_"Run you fools! RUN!" Elli shouted._

They looked at her then at the mobs nearing…and fled.

"They're gonna die." I mumbled.

"Urgh! Go after one of them!" Elli said bolting down one path.

"Which one?!" I shouted after her.

"Pick a path!" She called over her shoulder.

_Ummm…Inny minnie miney…Moe! My path choosen by superior technics of ancient Ko-Pong knowledge I raced down it._

~~~~~~

His master was NEVER going to live this down! Never! Obi-Wan continued to think of ways he'd be able to bring this incident up as he booked it down the paths so quickly opening in his wake as the herd of scary people followed.

Suddenly he was cut off! Another mob came down the side he was moving. Thinking fast he jumped over a few rails and bolted into a door in a rock immiatation.

Running down a maze of rails he came to a small group of people.

"Are you the last one?" A man asked him.

"uh…"

"Right, come on, it's about to start." He said quickly guiding the Jedi inside a room in the dim light.

"Take a seat here, strap in." He instructed.

Obi-Wan did so and looked next to him. A little boy sat looking at him in awe.

"I know you!" He whispered.

"You do, huh?"

"Yeah! You're Obi-wan Kenobi!"

"Well, I'm glad someone knows who I am." Obi-Wan told him.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN welcome to Mystery Mind Ride! Today's ride will be STAR WARS: STAR BATTLE!" Someone boomed over the mic and the lights went from dim to out. Suddenly the screen blared to life with strange music. The view lowered and sudden it showed that they were inside a craft.

"Rouge 2, move to the wing and keep position." A voice in the cockpit said.

Obi-wan blinked, then suddenly the seats shifted as they 'took off'. 

They tumbled and turned, and suddenly shots were fired at them!! Veering off and spinning again the room elated to screams of delight.

The little boy beside Obi-Wan looked like he was in deep concentration. Suddenly, as they 'blew up' one of the ships, he wooped out, "Woo-Hoo!"

Then they tumbled to the side again, with a very confused Obi-Wan Kenobi slammed to his seat.

**Elli:**

I watched Great Baldy flee from the little intersection screaming down the next path with the Mob in tail by a few yards. Stopping I turned down another path near me and took the short cut. At the next intersection I ran out into the line of fire pushing Great Baldy down the other path to his left. I think he thought I was a mob person cause he flipped out on me and shoved me into the 'trees and brush' near the path.

"Great Baldy, you baboon!" I shouted as he kept running.

Hearing me he turned around in a split second.

"Red?!"

"Yes you dolt! Get me out of here!" I ordered. He quickly jerked me out and we continued running.

"This way." I said.

"What way?" Great Baldy asked going another direction.

Groaning I grabbed him jerking him in another way. The mob was beginning to trail further and I dragged him into the line rails running through them.

"Pass please." The ticket guy said at the entrance to the Jumpy Thing (I can't remember what it's actually called! Lol) 

"Umm…You like Star Wars?" I asked quickly, hoping the mob wouldn't come around the corner any time soon.

"Hell yeah."  
"Great, here have this." I said jerking Great Baldy's cloak off.

"Hey!" Great Baldy demanded.

"Can we go in now?" I asked urgently.

The guy was grinning looking at the cloak.

"Go ahead!"

"But-!" Great Baldy didn't finish, I julted him into the 'ride'. Inside the tent were about 15 kids jumping everywhere, making everyone else fly another direction.

"Start Jumping!" I called.

"Why?!" He asked.

I jumped towards him and he went flying another way.

"Jump!" 

He got up on the wobbly surface and jumped the same time I did. Neither of us really landed, more like touched down and flew the other way along with a bunch of delighted screaming kids.

The mob passed the tinted tent not looking who was inside_, thank God!_

**Billie:**

_Ooo, look, candy! NO! Must find whoever's down this path! …mmmm…Chocolate…NO!_

"OOOOFFF!" Next thing I knew, I was on my back.

Evil Long Hair's head suddenly popped into my line of vision. 

"Blonde, are you ok?"

"Fine." I said getting up. I looked at the mob that was gaining on us.

"Come on!" I said running around a corner with Evil Long Hair in tow.

"ummm!" I nearly panicked seeing people flooding out of the Mystery Mind Ride. 

"Hold this like that!" I said grabbed a huge stuffed panda from a game prize booth.

"Hey!" The gamer said.

"20 bucks." I said throwing him a twenty from my back pocket. There went any plans for the Gap…

Evil Long Hair held the panda infront of him behind the booth as the crowds passed.

"K." I said throwing the panda at the gamer, and snatching my twenty back. Gap, here I come!

"Where are we going?" Evil Long Hair asked as I dragged him behind me running down the next path.

"Ahhhhhhh, Haaaaaaaaaa!" I spun around hearing the familiar flying scream. I looked at the Jumpy Thing and saw a bunch of people's shadows inside. Two were much taller than the others.

"This way." I said running the other way, jerking him with me by the wrist.

"Elli!" I demanded from the side of the tent.

Suddenly a form was plastered to the side.

"Billie?" Elli called as Great Baldy peeled himself from the side and jumped again making her and about a dozen kids scatter in the air.

"Get out of there and come on! We gotta find Braided One!" I demanded.

"Qui-Gon?" Great Baldy asked then was thrown through the air again.

"Hurry up Mace, stop bouncing off the walls, Obi-Wan's somewhere around here."

"Right!" Great Baldy replied jumping towards the exit with Elli close behind.

"Where'd he go last?" Elli asked running through the rails. 

"I dunno, I thought you knew."

"No." Elli looked at Great Baldy and Evil Long Hair, both who shrugged.

"We can't use or feel the Force here, I can't track him through our bond." Evil Long Hair told us.

"Rrrrr, crud!" Elli said, I know she was gonna say something else but didn't…lol.

"EWAN!" Elli and I looked down towards the Mystery Mind Ride and saw Obi-wan bolting from the exit doors, he was kinda wobbily.

"Come on!" Elli said running after him with the three of us in foot.

**~~~~~~~~**

Obi-Wan blinked as the screen went black and the lights came on again. People around him cheered and he couldn't understand why…They'd been shot down for Light's sake!

"Now, if you'd please move in an orderly fashion to the doors to the right of your seats you may leave Mystery Mind Ride." A person said. 

Quickly unstrapping, for fear of the light, Obi-Wan hurried down the stairs and out of the room running through the rail lines again. Almost to the door someone shouted, "EWAN!!" And a group of girls suddenly started chasing him again! Bursting out of the door he ran down the path.

"Obi-Wan!" He stopped. Spinning around he looked at Qui-Gon and Mace with Red and Blonde running with them towards him. 

"Go to the right!" Red shouted pointing. 

Looking there he saw the wooden building again and entered. The area was lite by small laterns and again he had to run through the rails.

**Elli:**

Barely beating the girls chasing Braided One the four of us ran into the Water Log Ride's entrance following him. Getting to the part where you needed tickets Braided One stopped and we caught up to him.

"Go under." I said leading the way, ducking under the turny thing.

The guys handling the ride noticed right away as we ran to the part where you get into the log things.

"You can't do that!"  
"What do you think you're doing people?!" They shouted.

"Sorry, emergency!" I said motioning for Great Baldy to get in, then Billie, Braided One, Evil Long Hair, then I jumped in. 

"20 bucks!" Billie shouted throwing them a bill.

"ok!" They shouted back allowing the ride to continue.

"Why are the seats wet?" Braided One asked shifting. I was in the front seating with Evil Long Hair. I looked back and almost laughed seeing Billie smooshed between Braided One and Great Baldy.

"What does it look like?" Billie said dropping her hand into the water just outside the floating log.

"What is thi-s?!" Great Baldy asked as we went onto the puller upper thing, making us rise a level.

"It's a water ride." I told him.

"There they are!" 

We all looked back to see two logs with the girls that had chased Obi-Wan.

"Uh-Oh…" I said as we were dumped into the water again and carried on with the current.

"Now what?" Evil Long Hair asked looking back as the girls were dropped back in. They actually began to paddle their hands in the water to pick up speed!

"Umm…" I started then had an idea.

Standing up, which was something you were NOT supposed to do…heh, I jumped to the side of the water onto the 'land' again and ran back towards the girls.

"ELLI!" Billie shouted along with the other three shouting…numerous names.

Getting to the part where the empty logs were supposed to be detoured I crouched down looking at the gears. Smiling I looked back up at them, "Hello there my bitches." 

They all looked at me funny then I changed the gears making them go another way. 

"Elli! Get back here!" Billie shouted. 

Running back it took me a bit to actually get into the log again. Finally stepping back in I plopped down infront of Evil Long Hair and glanced back. No one was coming, yay!

"Freedom!" I shouted.

"Gotcha!" Suddenly the woman that I had been arguing with when this whole thing started jumped from God knows where onto the front of the log.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!" Needless to say, I screamed in surprise and the look of murder in her eyes. 

"It's the sycophant!" Billie exclaimed.

Sycophant swung out to slap me but I ducked,…instead she slapped Evil Long Hair on mistake! HA!

"OH! Mr. Neeson, terribly sorry." She said quickly when Evil Long Hair looked at her again and blinked.

"Get off the log!" Billie shouted as it shifted from the odd weight express.

Dodging to the left from another hand I certainly noticed the wobble of it all. 

"You're going to tip us!" Braided One exclaimed as the woman suddenly jerked forward.

**Billie:**

_THAT BITCH! She is currently strangling my best friend! BITCH!_

"Alright, that's it!" I shouted trying to move from between Braided One and Great Baldy to get up into the next seating.

"Sit down!" Great Baldy ordered.

Evil Long Hair was now trying to unbend Sycophant's fingers from around Elli's neck. Elli's eyes looked like they were going to pop out!

"Hey bitch, let go!!" I demanded trying to reach over Braided One to hit her.

"Blonde!" Braided One exclaimed trying to steady the log.

"There!" Evil Long Hair suddenly got her hands off Elli's throat, but the woman frailed back. Grabbing the log she pulled us ALL over!

Spitting water out of my mouth I moved to stand in the knee deep water.

"I'm going to kill you! This is dry clean only!" I said, enraged leaping at the woman who had barely surfaced.

"No murder! No murder!" Great Baldy said grabbing me away.

"We have to get back on that log, they're coming back!" Elli suddenly said from her fit of coughs pointing behind us. Those little girls were back!!!!

"Forget her! Come on." Elli said grabbing my wrist and pulling me along onto the 'bank'.  The three Jedi followed and we ran up the incline, under Babe the Blue Ox..In which Braided One said, "Does he bite?"  
"He's a machine moron!" I shouted at him.

"Oh." Braided One said running under him. Elli and I both knew if we didn't catch up to the log by the end of this incline, we were done for. After this there were no banks left and then it was the big drop.

"Hurry up!" Elli yelled over her shoulder as she caught up to the log and ran beside it. 

Great Baldy jumped in…Then Braided One, then me, then Elli and Evil Long Hair.

We dropped into the fast water then and were pulled up for a few seconds.

"Now what?!" Great Baldy yelled over the water.

"Hang on!" Elli and I both yelled. Suddenly we slowed…then the green light…then DROP! SWISH! SPLASH! SPRAY!! The three Jedi were kinda ridged as we hit the side of the track and turned into the exit.

"Come on, we gotta get out of here." Elli said jumping out onto the exit mat. 

Once everyone was out we ran from the log chute and practically all the way to the car.

Elli's hands were shaking as she started the cougar. When it started everyone kinda just sat there, Elli didn't even drive yet.

"I told you I had a bad feeling about that.." Braided One pointed out.

Elli shot a glare at him…then a tap at the window. Elli groaned and rolled down her window.

"Miss…Step out of the car please."

Mall Of America's wonderful security…We're so dead with our parents..

~~~~~~~~~

"Hey Mom, look!" 9 year old Eric said motioning for his mother to come to him.

"Look at what sweetie?"

"That's that Jedi I saw in the ride!" He said pointing to the screen that was flashing pictures of the Log Chute across it.

Eric's mother looked at the picture. "I think you're right dear. But his name is Mr. McGregor, not Obi-Wan."

"That's not what he said." Eric argued.

Eric's mom smiled at him and patted his shoulder. "Yes dear, I'm sure he was very nice."

Mean while Eric's mom was actually thinking, _Damnit, why couldn't I have sat there!_

Tbc…

We know, we know, it wasn't that good, sorry! Again, thank you guys for the reviews on the last chapter! We hope we didn't disappoint you too badly! We'll update soon hopefully if FF.net agrees this time, Rrrr!

Till Later,

Billie&Elli


	3. Ch 3 Rentacops and Boats

**_Thanks for the reviews!!!!! DaleJr.luver8, SMWHIT103001, Nike, Laurianna, G. Zan, Harriet, Andy, Kaeryn, April, Nova Mist, Venus725, Star WaRs NuT, neila nuruodo the chiss, Maen Gwarth!!!!!!!!!!_**

**Hey ALLL!!!!!!!! Sorry it's taken SOOOOOOOOOOOO long for this to be updated, but the site died for a while and I was on vacation then B was on vacation, SORRY! And we're sad to say that your wait prolly isn't all that rewarded, this chapter Sucks! I hate this chapter! But we couldn't think of anything else to do to get to a particular point so we tried to make it as enjoyable as possible. Happy reading!**

Ch. 3 Payback's a B-

**Elli:**

How did we get here? This was insane…This was mad…This was HORRIBLE!!!!! This isn't supposed to happen to us! We're just trying to save three guys not from this time or/and galaxy…What's wrong with that? Urgh, and people say that teens don't care about anything but themselves, please.

"Do you realize how many laws you've broken in one day? Started a riot, distroyed public property, violated mall rules, you actually interferred with ride operations in Camp Snoopy! Who does that?!" Rent-a-cop officer Rawls babbled at me. This was getting old.

"Yeah, well, I plead self defense. You saw those people, they were going to kill us!" I nearly shouted. I was in this little investigation or holding room by my self with this psycho rent a cop. 

"You're violations are astronomical!" He shouted back. Suddenly everything froze.

**Billie:**

I glanced over at Great Baldy and Braided One who sat like little kids in trouble. Evil Long Hair was standing at the observation window watching Elli and the rent-a-cop guy in charge here. They didn't listen to us when we tried to tell them we were just trying to save three people, they just started rambling about all the things we did wrong. What's the matter with these people?! What if Evil Long Hair, Braided One, and Great Baldy were really the actors?! They'd sue, that's what they'd do! Sue!

"You don't have to worry really, she can argue out of anything." I assured the three around me. Evil Long Hair glanced at me then leaned on the wall still watching. I was surprised they let us view them.

"I don't understand why they filed charges…It was self defense." Braided One mentioned lowly.

"I don't know…They're just messed up. A bunch of rent-a-cops trying to get into the tabloids." I told him rolling my eyes and sitting back  looking back in at Elli. She looked bored.

Great Baldy sighed and crossed his arms. I glanced at the clock, we had to get to competition in less than 2 hours…Blake was going to kill us if we ever showed up at the stables.

"THAT'S IT!" We all looked shocked back into the room as Elli jumped up, knocking her chair over, and shouting over and over, "That's it! It's simple!!!" 

"What the hell?" I murmured standing. 

All the rent a cops in the room with Elli suddenly jumped up and pinned her to the table at the sudden movement and motivation of her outburst.

"What are they doing?!" Braided One exclaimed as we pressed to the glass like a bunch of new parents or something.

"Get the hell off of her you pack of idiots!!!" A voice boomed. I nearly choked seeing my UNCLE storm into the room. He happened to be a sergant in a close police station…he didn't seem pleased that his favorite niece and her best friend, who he probably favored even more..gah, were in custody of Mall Of America police.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?! I hope she files for harassment!" Uncle Greg continued grabbing Elli away from the group.

"Who's that?" Great Baldy asked. 

"My uncle, he'll get us out of here." I assured him with a smirk.

"He doesn't look happy." Braided One said watching as Greg chewed the people inside out about interrogating a 16 year old rather then actually doing their jobs. He was like me, when he was pissed, he was pissed.

"And if you have a problem with it, you can take it up with my captain who also happens to handle your **pay---checks!" He hollared separating pay and checks purposely.**

"Billie, come on!" He ordered. "Bring your little friends too." He said storming out of the area with Elli in hand.

The door opened and a shaky officer let us out motioning for us to go. 

"You'll think twice next time now won't ya?" I questioned with a grin. 

"Blonde!" Great Baldy demanded. 

*********

"Alright, alright, if you didn't want to tell me how you met them you didn't need to go through the cost of making up one of your stories Elli." Uncle Greg said with a sigh. Currently we were standing outside the department with Great Baldy, Evil Long Hair, and Braided One still in his car. I had driven Elli's car back.

Elli and I all but gaped. 

"But-" Elli started.

"Enough Elli, no more Fresca for you I think  you had some again this morning." He said, putting his hand up. 

"But, but-!"

"Billie, make her shut up." 

I clamped my hand over Elli's mouth and grinned at my uncle. "We should go." 

"I'll be talking to you about this little episode later, you're just lucky I have a meeting." Greg warned shaking his finger at us.

"Wasn't second guessing it Greg." I said innocently.

"Stay out of trouble." He added moving up the steps.

"Us? You have to tell?" 

Greg turned and glared at me and I waved nicely.

Too suddenly I realized Elli wasn't moving beside me. Warily looking at her I released my hand and stepped away.

"What are you doing…?" I questioned.

"I'm…"

"No."

"I'm…" 

"No! Don't say it Elli!"

"I'm thi-"

"Come back towards the light for all that is sacred!"

"I'm thinking." 

"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed, scaring the pigeons and making people stop looking at us. 

"Er…umm…Go on about your day people." I waved on. They wouldn't understand. They wouldn't understand the insanity of those words….No one understands! Ahhh!

"I've got it! We have to find an astronomical door." Elli erupted.

"Oh…That'll be simple." I groaned as she jerked me with her back towards the cars.

"Relax, I know what I'm doing." She told me. For some reason I didn't like the sound of that either. 

"Is everything alright?" Evil Long Hair asked as Elli opened the back door of the police car. 

"Yeah, no problems." She assured him with a smile as the other two got out too. "We just have to take a little trip."

I snapped to attention at this.

"Trip?"

"To Biengie's place." She said, as if that had no affect.

"Biengie?!" I all but shouted. 

"What's Biengie?" Braided One asked, testing the name.

"He's a real nice guy out in Prior Lake." Elli said moving towards her car.

"In the MIDDLE of Prior Lake!" I corrected. "And he's not nice—He's insane. I heard he's a canniable." 

"Billie.."

"No, I'm not going out there…Not to mention we don't have a boat." 

Elli just grinned.

*********

"Is this legal?" Great Baldy and Evil Long Hair questioned as Elli opened the engine plank.

"uh…"

"No." I provided. "It's against the law. We're going to be sued and thrown in prison for the rest of our lives."

"Drama queen. It'll just be a couple of months. Maybe with Greg's help just a big fine." Elli said. "Braided One, come here." 

"Couple of Months?!"

"Maybe we shouldn't be doing this…Obi-Wan, don't get in there." Evil Long Hair said stopping his apprentice from stepping into the boat that was NOT ours.

"We don't have a choice if you guys want to get out of here." Elli said standing from leaning over the back seats. 

"But break the law?" Great Baldy questioned…I think that little run in with MOA police gave him a scare or something…Some big bad Jedi. I wasn't worried about breaking the law really, it was only if we were caught, I was just worried about going to Biengie's. The guy was NUTS! Elli only knew him cause she flipped a jet-ski once and he lives on this little island thing and it was the closest swim. Apparently she thought he was nice…I think he's a canniable.

"Bending it Master Windu." Elli corrected, she was getting that look about her. That determind look—I don't like that look either.

"Master, if one more female tries to grab me I'm going to go insane. This might be our only way back." Braided One backed up.

Elli and Braided One looked at Evil Long Hair and Great Baldy…then they all looked at me.

"What? I'm not apart of this..as far as I'm concerned I'm being held captive if we're caught, got it?"

Elli smirked and motioned for Braided One to step into the boat, this time Evil Long Hair didn't stop him. Wow, I got say in this little pow-wow now. Woo-Hoo me!

After a while the engine choked and started.

"Alright, we're in business. B get the front buckle would you? Guys get in."

Evil Long Hair and Great Baldy glanced at eachother as I jumped in the front undoing the buckle holding us in. I stayed in the front as Elli took the 'driver's' seat and Braided One the navigator's. 

"You better sit down." I mentioned to Great Baldy and Evil Long Hair as Elli backed us out.

"You're getting rather clo-" Evil Long Hair started, but Elli scrapped along the side of the dock as we were coming out. I cringed at the sound. "..se."

"oops. I'll leave a check." She said with a shrug. 

"Do you have a grant to opperate one of these?" Great Baldy asked as Evil Long Hair was wise enough to sit, Great Baldy wasn't so smart. Elli rammed down the thrust and we nosed up out of the LOW WAKE area. I nearly tumbled off my seat and Great Baldy was slammed back into the back seats with Evil Long Hair. Even Braided One looked a bit nervous at the little episode.

"Are you sure we're supposed to be going this fast?" He called over the splashing water and wind.

"Uhh…well…" Elli never actually answered the question as we nosed higher. "I don't see a speed notice." Was all she said as we curved right…I nearly fell over the side.

"Don't these things have seat belts or something?!" 

"Just hang on B." Elli replied.

"I think something's ahead.." Braided One said squinting at the navi-screen. Whoever had this boat was spendy.

"What?" Elli said, leaning over to see.

"Eyes on the water! Eyes on the water!" I shouted. Evil Long Hair jumped up jerking the steering left. He must have seen the not so noticably for Elli, HUGE ROCK IN OUR PATH!

"OW!" I exclaimed, landing with a thump on the floor. 

"Ooo, sorry!" Elli said taking the steering again.

"Maybe you should slow down!" Great Baldy commented as I crawled towards the back..I didn't want to see where we were going. Watching death come was horrible. I was beginning ot see the light at the end of the tunnel.

"I think you're right!" Elli shouted back pulling back a lever. Suddenly chains rattled and another slash hit the water.

"What was that?" Evil Long Hair questioned.

"ummm…The anchor I think." My brillant little red friend replied. 

Suddenly the boat jerked and a bunch of kids on a nearby floating raft dock flipped off into the water. And then there was two…A boat and a dragging wooden raft. 

"Sorry!" Elli shouted as they cussed us out.

"That's it!" I exclaimed lunging at my buddy ol' pal. 

We probably looked something like Homer Simpson and Bart when Homer's trying to strangle him. Evil Long Hair and Great Baldy tried to pry me off and Braided One tried to get to the steering as we circled and circled, and circled some more. Finally the waves got really big and when I finally released my blue turning friend we happened to hit a large one and Evil Long Hair, Great Baldy, and I plunged over the other side.

**Elli:**

_Oooooo, look at the pretty light…so warm…so nice..wait a tick…It's cloudy out. Umm… _

Suddenly reality came rushing back as I saw Billie, Evi Long Hair, and Great Baldy fly over the side of the boat with a splash.

Coughing I let Braided One man the steering as I looked over the side and behind us as the distance quickly grew. Three heads popped up and B was slapping the water maddly. She could swim right? Of course she could…she must not be happy.

"Turn us around." I told Braided One scratchy while I broke off the anchor's hatch.

Braided One turned…Fast! He didn't bother to slow down! Nearly toppling off myself I came back and pulled back the only other level next to the steering and slowed us down instantly.

"Wow, that was quick." Braided One mentioned.

"I hope our deaths are." I told him watching B rant from a distance.

**Billie:**

"The one day! ONE DAY! I wear my dry clean only I get soaked TWICE in less then 2 hours difference!" I screamed slapping the water.

"Relax Blonde, I'm sure it'll be fine." Evil Long Hair said watching the raft fast approaching.

"This is ridiculas! Do you two always get in so much trouble?!" Great Baldy shouted. 

"Only when you're around!" I screamed back. "You're like a bad omen."

"You're like a nightmare!" He shouted back. Evil Long Hair began to backstroke away.

"Hey! I could just leave you with the Mob!" 

"They would have been better then this!"

"We'll just see about that!"

"Good!"

"GOOD!"

"B, shut up and come on." Elli said as she and Braided One helped Evil Long Hair out of the water and into the boat.

"I can't deal with this, this is insane!" I continued swimming towards the boat.

"Calm down." Braided One instructed.

"I'm a fugitive of Mall Of America! Who does that?!" I shouted.

"We're not fugitives." Elli corrected as I was inside the boat.

"We are now! We stole a boat for crying out loud!" 

"We're going to return it, don't worry." Elli said calmly helping Great Baldy in. 

"I worry!" 

"Sit down, we'll be fine." Braided One said taking the steering rather then Elli, thank God.

"When did you become a voice of reason here?" I questioned, sitting hard in the back, soaked and not a happy camper.

"Look, all we have to do is get to Biengie's and we'll figure out what to do, alright?" Elli said suddenly.

"Which way?" Braided One asked.  
"That way." She pointed.

Braided One sped us up going East. 

"I'm a fugitive from Mall of America.." I muttered.

Tbc…

What did I tell you? *shudders* Sorry again—Promise next chapter WILL BE better! We just had to get to a point and now we're there so it'll get funny again soon! Don't forget to review please!!!


	4. Ch 4 Swamp Men and Insanity to the Max

**Thanks for the reviews!!!!!!!!!!!! Chinow, Padawan Anika, Malenaa, Jedi Knight Tahl, Anoriel (or just Nory, Harriet, Kaeryn, Wedge ****Antilles****, G. Zan, Deanna, lighted eagle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

1.) Thank a billion guys! We're glad you weren't too disappointed with that chapter. And to answer a very debated question…Sadly, no, we have no idea where we're really going. We have an outline and where we're going to get to last chapter, but as far as anything in between, Heeellllll no we don't know what we're doing.. :) 

2.) Yes, there is a lake called Prior Lake in MN. Most of these areas are real. I did rename my community and some of the streets probably don't exist, but the community and the people based are real as well. Biengie is really Biengie, and you'll see why I tell you that here. He's very uh..Laid back yet somewhat I dunno. Prior Lake is about 20 minutes West, SouthWest of the twin cities. It's huge!!!!! Lots of different areas that we'll introduce you to next chapter.

3.) As for this chapter, I'm just going to say you've been warned for insanity from the start and it really kicks in here! Lol. Don't forget that our little Jedi friends can't use the Force and have no feeling of it here so they may not act as they normally would…*Cough cough, Great Baldy, Cough* Enjoy and Happy Reading!

Ch. 3 Payback's a B-

"You're certain??" Braided One questioned as we slowed coming to the solitary island in which only one strange house was settled within the trees. This was the very back part of Prior Lake, hardly anyone came back here…probably because there was a presumed cannibal here..

"Yeah. Interesting place isn't it?" She said.

"Interesting is…one word to discribe it." He replied scanning over the area.

What was once the lawn was knee high in weeds and grass. Three pink flamigos claimed it as well with a little dwarf, a rien deer, a fake horse and a decoration of Christmas lights around a pine tree in it's center. Huge trees hid the 'back yard', dangling with moss which was unusal for a Minnesota area. The only passage off and on was by boat, and that was scary. The house itself was only accesable by walking on this little path way thing. One both sides were steep slopes leading into more woods and probably something of a swamp.

"You're sure this man is going to help us?" Evil Long Hair questioned as his apprentice guided the boat into the empty boat settle on the certain to be home made dock.

"If not, he'll eat us." I told him standing and throwing the rope onto the attachment securing it.

We all kind of just stood there looking at the dock. I glanced at the other four and they just kind of glanced between themselves.

"That's stable?" Great Baldy questioned looking at the creaking dock.

"I've…never really seen anyone on it before. I always take a jetski in." Elli said tilting her head and looking at the rotten wood and rusted medal.

"Well Nancy Drew, you can go first. This was your idea." I said nudging my friend towards the dock. 

Elli glared at me but stepped onto the side of the boat using Evil Long Hair as a stable post. Slowly she stepped onto the dock and released Evil Long Hair's arm. For a second she didn't move. Then she bounced up and down a little and grinned. "It's all go-" Suddenly there was a loud snapping sound and lots of creaking. Next thing I knew Elli was back in the boat.

"Maybe we should beach in…" She suggested.

**Elli: A Short Time Later**

"Biengie!" I yelled banging on the door. No one answered. "Bieng!" I hollared hitting the door harder. 

"I don't think he's home." Billie said leaning on the open, extremely old screen door.

"I wouldn't d-" Great Baldy started but then all that was heard was wood snapping and a scream. Billie was suddenly out of sight and curses were certainly sounding abrutly along with thumps and tree branches snapping along the way.

I grimaced and whimpered as I looked over the side of the walk down the steep hill. With no more noise I shouted down, "Yo B!" No answer.

"What's down there?" Evil Long Hair asked wincing at the smell of moss and mushrooms.

"Umm…Biengie's personal…mucas pond…" I told him with a sigh.

"Billie?" I called again.

"Blonde!" Great Baldy hollared.

"I'm here, would you shut up!" Billie replied. Well, at least she replied to him.

"Hey Elli…Uh…There's somethin' moving down here." 

"Biengie's pet alligator." I whispered to the three around me.

"What's an alligator?" Braided One and Evil Long Hair asked at the same time.

"It's a type of reptile. They get really big, they can swim, and they're carnivors. Real long mouths and sharp teeth." I told them.

"Sounds a lot like a Polar Bear…" Braided One mentioned. At this I had to stifle a laugh. (If anyone's confused, look back to chapter 8 of DR, lol!)

"Oh…uh..sorta." I replied.

"What'd you say?!" Billie called from below. I could hear her trying to move out of the swampy like mucas. 

"Uh, nothing. She was explaining how…mushrooms grow differently here then in our reality!" Braided One called back. 

"Nice." I whispered. "Hey, B, no worries but perhaps you should boogie back up here." 

"Oh, right, I'm really enjoying sitting here in green nasty slime because I just can!!!" She shouted.

I groaned and waited for her to make her way back up.

**Billie:**

_Urgh, this was disgusting. Who keeps this in their yard? A cannible, that's who!  _

Achieving the ability to stand I slowly turned around so was not to loose my balance. I frowned hearing strange breathing. It was like…

Mechanical…

_Cccciiiiooooo-Kiiiiiiiiiiii……Cccciiiiioooooo-Kiiiiiiiiiii…._

It, if only heard by my untamed imaginationative mind, sounded like it was saying Cookie just really delayed and drawn in breaths.

_Ccccciiiiiiiiioooooooo-Kkkiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii….._

"Ummm….Elli? There's something down here. Something big." I called up looking around quickly.

"What's it look like?" She called back.

"I don't know! I can hear it breathing though." I replied.

"Well that's not good. Mutation.." I heard her whisper. Strange how words travel in valley like areas.

"What do you mean mutation??"

"Again, no worries or anything…But Biengie happens to _maybe have a pet alligator." Elli shouted down._

"A What?!?!?!?!" Suddenly something was behind me and the breathing was louder and I could hear smushing under movement. Turning I looked at…it. (Dramatic pause just for good measure.) And there, in the swamps of Biengie Land I saw it. The slime covered, goo messed, leech invested, fried hair sticking out, swamp man!!!!

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

**Elli:**

"Ah, shit. I really didn't want to get slimey." I groaned but never the less began sliding down the hill while Billie's long winded scream continued.

"Are you sure we can't just leave her with nature? I'm sure she'd benefit from this." Great Baldy suggested as he was the last one to follow.

"Oh, yeah, right. Benefit from her head being bitten off after she passed out from lack of oxygen from screaming." I replied jumping over a log that I really didn't know how Billie rolled beyound.

"It's Swamp Man!!!!!!!!!!!!" She screamed. 

"Uh-Oh.."

"What's a swamp man?" Evil Long Hair asked. 

"Uh…Nothing. Just a figment of imagination really." I replied wincing. 

Just as we were coming into view of my terrified little blonde friend she screamed, "Die Swamp Man! DIE!" 

"No Billie!" I shouted running through the muck, not an easy thing to do, towards them. There was no way I was going to get to her in time, er maybe I just didn't really want to, so instead I shoved Great Baldy in the way. Sadly for him, her aim was correct and she latched onto a nuce hold around his neck.

"Evil Demon, I banish you!!!!!" She continued as Great Baldy, losing his ability to speak, frailed around trying to get her off. Evil Long Hair moved to intervene, but I said, "No, don't get pulled in too…He's gone." He looked at me, then back at the two and nodded trying to keep a smirk off his face I could tell. I too was wondering just what Great Baldy was going to do after this little episode.

"Elli? That you?" 'Swamp Man', aka Biengie, asked removing his mask and turning off the machanical breather. "Well, where ya been girl? I've not seen you in a long time." He said in his heavily accented Irsh voice.

"Around. You know, starting riots, meeting intergalatical people, breaking laws, hot wiring boats…The norm." I told him. 

"Who's your friends? They look awfuly familiar." Biengie said squinting at Braided One and Evil Long Hair. Biegnie doesn't have a tv, so he doesn't know who celebraties are or what characters movies show…So if he says he thinks he knows these two that's a really big compliment.

"Right, uh…This is Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi." I introduced. "Guys, Biengie." 

"Aye, I'd shake your hand but…" He moved his gloved slime covered hands. 

We all glanced to the insuing battle 15 feet from us as Great Baldy lost his balance and collapsed with Billie in the disgusting lily pad covered, green gooy stuff infested, God knows what living, muddish water. All of us grimaced.

"And that one?" Biengie questioned.

"Which one? The bald one or the blonde?" 

"Both I suppose." He said studying them as neither moved.

"Blonde one is about to die, but her name's Billie. The bald one is about to murder, but his name is Mace Windu." I explained to him.

"I think she's in a dangerous position. Perhaps we should do something.." Evil Long Hair said as Great Baldy slowly, slowly, stood and was beginning to turn.

I took a breath and watched.

"Master, I don't think there's a use to causing harm to others…" Braided One said putting a hand on his shoulder. 

**Billie:**

_Swamp Man down, swamp man down!!! Victory is mine!!! Ahhhh-Haaaaa! _

As I wiped the grime from out of my eyes I finally focused on Swamp Man. He was standing. _Uh-Oh…Take base effect. Maiday Maiday!!! (Is that how you spell that???)  Extensive Maneuvers! Go for the shins, the shins, Blonde 1!!_

Coming out of my talk to my..uh…self, I sprang into action. Like a cat…A jungle cat! Pouncing forward I latched onto his foot and bit his ankle, no matter how grime covered.

Vaguely I was aware of people yelling…

**Elli:**

"Oo!" I peeped, then clamped my hands over my mouth as Billie latched onto Great Baldy.

"Get her off of me!!! Jinn! Get Over Here!" 

Braided One, Evil Long Hair, and I moved into action staying totally away from any misunderstanding with the two crazed people. I pounced on Billie trying to unlock her jaw from Great Baldy's ankle. Evil Long Hair subdued Great Baldy who was most definitely going to murder if allowed. Braided One took Billie's feet and tried to pull her back. 

"Come on B, let him go…" I groaned. Finally she let go and the three of us flew in different directions. Evil Long Hair had to lock Great Baldy's arms above his head in something like a head lock type thing…Must be something they learned at the Temple or something.

Billie moved to make another attack but Braided One and I pinned her down.

"NO! Stay girl!" I ordered.

"Mace, calm down…" Evil Long Hair tried to tell Great Baldy who was desperately trying to get to Billie, no less going to strangle her. 

"Eh? Great Baldy?" Billie questioned seeing the incrediably hilarious looking dou behind us.

"Yes, Great Baldy You Nit-Wit!!!!!!!!!!!" He shouted, again trying to struggle free of Evil Long Hair's grasp. 

"Umm…What's the meaning of all of this Elli?" Biengie asked casually studying some fungi. 

"The fungi or why we're…Ow! Here. Stop struggling Billie."

"He's gonna kill me!!!"

"I'm going to Kill Her!!" Great Baldy echoed.

"Killing in cold blood is against the code Master Mace." Braided One so kindly reminded.

"I don't care!! I'm doing the universe a favor!!!!" 

"Hey now, that was mean…" I said.

"The reason you're all here." Biengie said, oblivious to the four of us struggling against eachother. 

"We need an astronomical doorway. Do you know where one is?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, right around the corner! Please Elli, you act as though it's no biggie." Billie said still trying to get as far away from Great Baldy as possible. 

"Oooo, that's a toughy. Come, let's go to the house and we'll figure this out." Biengie said gently pulking a mushroom from it's place and walking up the slope.

"Hey, Hey, truce." I demanded.

"Mace, you can't kill her. Find your center." Evil Long Hair instructed as though he were talking to a fit throwing child. 

"I can't find my center when there's no Force here to find it in!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He shouted. This, I decided, was why he was so out of control. With no ability to find peace in their beloved Force, it was a mad game to be had when angry.

Never the less, Great Baldly took many deep breaths. "Alright…Alright, let me go. I won't kill her." 

Slowly the three of us reffs let up on our people. Billie stood silently watching the man deemed to destined to kill her. Great Baldy seemed ok…A little TOO ok… 

"Die Sith Girl!!!!!!!!!!!" Great Baldy shouted running at her.

The last thing I saw of Billie was a scream then her back as she rushed into the surrounding wood, Great Baldy in hot pursuit. The three of us sane ones glanced at eachother and with a sigh shrugged. Gradually we finally got back to the top of the slope and entered Biengie's open door. He was obviously in deep thought if he left his door open. 

"You don't suppose…" Braided One trailed off beginning to stop at the door and glanced back. 

"Don't even wonder Padawan, you'll do yourself damage to know what Mace is going through." Evil Long Hair told him.

"Or what Billie is going to go through…" I muttered finding Biengie at his computer.

**Billie:**

_Breathe, breathe, breathe, oo gotta keep running, be sure to breathe run, breathe run, breathe run…_

Finding that no one was behind me I stopped my mad run and braced on my knees looking around me. No birds called…No creeping critter moved…No nothing. I was in…**The Dead Woods.**

Whimpering I dropped to my knees. Then having an idea I grinned—"I am soo scared…I'm so scared…" Drip, drip.. "I just want to get out of here…" Drip.

I grinned again, I always wanted to do that. 

Suddenly there was a snap and a terrifying battle cry.

Tbc…

Well? How was that one? Hope you enjoyed! 


	5. Ch 5 Alligators, Murry, and Sedated Jedi

**Thanks for the Reviews!!!! Blue Dragoness ( heh, we were trying to think of such things but Billie was starting to scare herself so we decided not to kill her, lol! Close though! Lol. Hope you still like this chapter!)****, Padawan Anika (An extremely LONG vacation..heh, we have things planned though..Mwhahaha! *grin* Sorry this took so long and we still don't think it's very good. Hope you like though!),**** G. Zan (I know, you kinda have to wonder don't you? Which one is worse off? Disturbing after a while really. Lol. Hope you like the chapter! Hehehe!)****, Kaeryn (*billie* Really? I do that talking to my self thing all the time. 'shut up billie, they're going to think you're insane.' 'Quiet, they already do think We're insane.' 'no, not me, you. You're the speaking half I just talk to you.' 'shut up, you're making me dizzy.' Oh, uh, sorry. Hehe, Thanks again!), ****Harriet (I know! Can you believe he has a PET alligator?? Who does that?! It's really freaky too and I always watch where I step when I'm there. Heheh), ****Venus725(OMG! We laughed so hard reading your review!), ****Medi-Jai ferret(This chapter might disappoint you but we hope not too badly. Sorry! Thanks for the review!), ****Laurianna (ahh, we wondered when someone would mention the stables. We just so happened as to have it planned to start in next chapter. Hehe, should be interesting. We have a bit of a dilemma setting in on this chapter which should put some good humor in the next ones, lol! Enjoy!) , ****lighted eagle (Well, it's not REALLY funny, but we hope it's good enough to get you to smile at least! Hope you like!), ****Deanna (Heheh, we liked the polar bear thing too. That's now like a little inside joke when people mention a polar bear for some reason we just bust out laughing. It's happened and yes we are now considered more insane then normal now..urgh. lol), ****well duh… (Umm, just slightly yeah. He's a tad angry. *Billie* I told him to take those anger management classes. Did he listen? Noooo..heh)  ****Silverwolfprincess (We'll try to read your stories! Promise!) ****Dragonlet (Hope you like this one too! It's not the best but we felt bad about making you guys wait so long. Next one WILL be better! Promise!) , ****ihadanepiphany (Nice trick, lol. Oooo! We were wondering how to spell 'banshee' so we kinda guessed lol. Thanks, we'll fix it when this is done with same with all the other million and million typos! Lol. Thank ya!) , ****DaleJr.luver8 (Glad you liked! Hope you like this one too but we're warning you, it's not that good.. :) Enjoy!) !!!!! ****We felt horrible for making you wait so we did personal thank you's for this chap. Took us a while, but they're fun! Lol. **

Thanks again guys! Now, we don't think this one is very good. It's semi humorous but next one will be better. Hope you like! 

Ch. 5 Payback's a B-

"Ah….Astronmical door…I see. It wasn't so hard to find." Biengie told me as he shifted his glasses higher on his nose to see better. "Exactly 34 _el spanish stuff cause I don't understand what he's saying…"_

I glanced at Evil Long Hair and Braided One sitting stiffly on the couch. Braided One trying to get free of Biengie's cat who presisted on rubbing on him…Who can blame her?? Just kidding!

"Mesa speaka nosa Strange Talk…Normal terms Bieng." I told him.

"It's about 100 miles up from Baxtor Rd…Right near your school actually."

"100 miles?! That's not _right __near my school." _

"No no dear, 100 miles up as in level…In the air??" Biengie explained sliding off his glasses.

"…Ooohhhhh….." Braided One, Evil Long Hair, and I all said in unison. 

"How did anyone find it there?" I asked.

"Do you really want to know?" He questioned, giving me the eye.

"Nooo…Not really." I said pacing again. I glanced outside to see a very disturbing site.

**Billie: A dozen minutes Prior**

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed as HE came flying at me.

"Back Great Baldy!" I exclaimed as I picked up a stick after dodging him and getting ready to swing. 

"Get back I say!" He was making these really weird noises…Like something that a rabid dog would make…No more like a rabid chipmunk. Hmmm…I have a man sized rabid chipmonk on my hands.

"I've gone insane…I've lost my mind…You made me insane…You're crazy…You're contagious…Yes, that's it…You're a virus! Die!!!" Great Badly mumbled to himself, his eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights. He lunged at me again but I side stepped and slugged him on the back…But the stick was rotten and it splattered as soon as it made contact.

"I must help the universe! You can't live! You'll destroy us all! WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Great Baldy ranted. 

Out of a weapon I fled again, Great Baldy making a weird clucking sound and following. He sounded something like a chicken…_Hmm…Umm..KFC would taste really good right now…Yummmm…AHH! Hold a tick, how did I get here? REWIND!_

_Right…Right, running, uh-huh. K, we saw this part, fast forward…Wait! STOP! There! Chuckling Chicken, Rabid Chipmunk, Great Baldy running after me…K, we're running. Still running. Running, stopping, looking around, running again. O! There! LOOK! _

Suddenly I looked next to me and there it was. Camouflaged in the greenery of the swampy like area was IT. Something breathing, something big, something with Really Sharp Teeth. 

"ALIGATOR!" I sceamed running away. 

"What?!" Great Baldy came back to his senses…Right before I plowed him over and we became a tangled mess. 

"STOP KICKING!" Great Baldy ordered. All I really heard was the weird snapping sound the aligator was making as it flew out of the shallow waters and towards us.

"I'M SORRY!" I shouted.

"OW! STOP YELLING IN MY EAR!"

"GET IT AWAY!" I screamed finally getting away from Great Baldy and scrambling up. Running like hell I realized I was alone. Looking behind I figured I must have done something to Great Baldy's ankle cause he was like hobbling along while the gator was catching up rather quickly.

_Uh-Oh…Gotta do something—But will he kill me if I keep him alive?? Well, life forgives hopefully._

Done talking to myself, yet again, I looked around. To my left there was an old rusted wheel barrel, why in the hell did Biengie keep a wheel barrel over here?? Probably to feed this thing! 

Using my oh so effective quick thinking I ran over to it and grabbing the handles pushing away…while running I happened to scoop up Great Baldy and veering to the side to miss the gator. Soon I noticed I'd scooped Great Baldy backwards, he was back up trying to hang on for life with my 'extensive manuevers'. 

"Tree!" He shouted as I veered again away from it, gator still in pursuit. I didn't know they did that, followed their prey I mean. 

"Log!" _Right turn, whoa! Keep Great Baldy in the barrel…Almost home free!!! I SEE THE HOUSE/SHACK!_

Suddenly Elli came flying out the door…With an extremely large rifle in her hands, or what looked to be a rifle. Hey, when did she learn how to shoot??????

**Elli: Few Minutes Prior**

"Oh..My…God.." I muttered. There out the window was a sight that I would never forget for all of my years. 

Billie Ladnier was covered in mud and grime head to foot and was pushing a wheel barrel with who else but Great Baldy in it! At first I figured it was just Billie going to drop him somewhere and run like hell, but Evil Long Hair pointed something out.

"What's that behind them?"

"It moves very strange.." Braided One added.

"Bieng…Where's Murry??" Murry being the pet aligator. 

"Uh…That ain't Murry…She's too big." 

"Pardon?" Evil Long Hair questioned.

"When did you get two?!" I nearly shouted.

"I didn't! I'm just telling you that's too big to be Murry!" Biengie cried.

Groaning I ran into THE back room. Not just a back room, THE back room. Coming back out I loaded Biengie's emergency tranquilizer, just in case Murry got a bit grumpy some day.

"What are you doing with that?" Biengie asked as I set in the second dart in the back up caption. Biengie's all up to date on this thing if anything.

"What do you think?! It's gonna eat them!"

"Red, it's gaining." Braided One pointed out. 

Running out I barely heard Biengie remind me that I don't know how to handle a weapon of this size…How hard could it be??

"B, get THE HELL out of the way!!" I ordered bracing the weapon on my shoulder and looking down the rather large barrel. Billie started just weaving back and forth on the small trail thing.

"No don't weave you reject! Just run in a straight line!"

"Do you know how to shoot?" Evil Long Hair said as he and the other two came outside.

"Uh…Just stay behind me." I told him. 

"You've never done this before?!" Braided One asked.

"Sure I have…I shot a rifle when I was 13..And I hit the target thank you." I did really, but that was nearly 4 years ago now and I hadn't really touched a gun since.

"Elli!" Billie shouted.

_Concentrate…Focus…Don't think-- feel..What the F-…Where'd that come from????_

I kinda glanced back at Evil Long Hair who looked back quizically. Rolling my eyes I looked back to the gator taking aim and praying to God that Great Baldy or Billie wouldn't go seepy any time soon. Tighten the triggar…

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" That would be Billie making that totally annoying sound. Extremely high pitch and panicking. She dumped Great Baldy over and ended up flipping over the wheel barrel and ending up right next to him. 

"Who'd you hit?!" The three behind me shouted. 

"The gator thank you." I told them as the gator flopped down after a few wobbling steps. Still with the large rifle thing I ran over to the groupies down. 

Both had a very wide eye set. Short, shallow breathing was a high in both. 

"Am I dead??" Great Baldy asked stunned.

"You're not dead Mace." Evil Long Hair told him leaning over him.

"Damn.." He muttered as he began to sit up but Evil Long Hair and Braided One pinned him down. 

"Sorry Mace, we can't let you do anything you'll regret." Evil Long Hair told him regretfully.

"I'm not going to kill her." Great Baldy sighed.

"That's what you said last time." Braided One reminded.  
"I was insane at the time." Great Baldy informed him casually.

"We gathered that." Billie said.

"B, don't push it. He's unstable." I told her.

"I'm not unstable." Great Baldy corrected. 

"Of course not Master Mace." Braided One said kindly. 

"Obi-wan.." Great Baldy warned.

Braided One glanced at Evil Long Hair who kind of shrugged and let up on his friend and his apprentice did the same. 

Putting to the side the tranq gun I helped Billie sit. I glanced to the side to see Biengie carefully studying the gator. 

"What, or who, is it Bieng?"

"She's a she, dunno who she is though." Biengie replied in thought.

"Well that's comforting." I muttered.

**Billie:**

"Ow, I think I have brain damage." I said.

"I agree to that." Great Baldy told me so affectionately.

"I should have left you for gat- Braided One st-!!" I cringed covering my eyes as he stood and stepped to the side bumping the rifle. 

"Ow…You shot me Obi.." Thud. Evil Long Hair was now in black out land.

"I didn't do anything!" Braided One defended throwing his hands up.

"You hit the gun you idiot!" I replied pricking the dart out of Evil Long Hair's side. 

"I ki-..I killed him?" He mumbled, looking like he was about to go into shock.

"You didn't kill him Obi-Wan." Elli assured patting him on the back and moving to Evil Long Hair's side.

"He..Uh..Didn't kill him did he?" I whispered to Elli. 

"No, he's just going to be…away for a while." 

Biengie suddenly plucked the dart from my hand and held it up to the sun.

"A good hour at least he'll be out cold. It'll take a while for it to get out of his system." He informed us. "It didn't inject all the way, only half at the most." 

"So, he's not dead?" Great Baldy questioned.

"NO!" I shouted. "You people are obsessed with death!" 

"B, take it easy." Elli instructed.

"This is crazy. Now we have a passed out 6 foot something Jed-ersomething that we're gonna have to haul around." I muttered.

"How long before he's coherent?" Elli asked turning the limp form of Evil Long Hair onto his back.

"I can give him a reverse effect, but it won't leave him system totally for the next 2 hours or so." Biengie told us.

"Uh, yeah yeah do that." I said waving my hand.

"Stay here." Biengie told us as he went back towards his shack.

Elli glanced at Braided One who still looked…not so well. "Obi-Wan, it was an accident, he'll be fine. No worries."

"You're sure?" He asked hoarsly.

"Absolutely. He'll just be a little looney for a while."

"Looney?" Great Baldy questioned. 

"Out of it…Something of insane except not to your murdering extent o' Great Baldy." I told him, making sure to keep a safe distance away. Surprisingly enough he didn't even move to kill me.

"Hey Elli, what are we supposed to do about finals?" I asked.

Elli looked at me crossly, "We have three Jedi on our hands from another universe and you're worried about riding finals?" 

On this I thought a moment…then nodded, "Yeah, yeah pretty much." 

Elli groaned.

"Well Elli, we've been trying to get here for a year, A YEAR, and we're just going to give it up?!" I exclaimed. "I've worked too hard for this to throw it away cause of some Jedi that would rather kill me then accept help." I pointed at Great Baldy.

Elli looked to be in thought a bit and Braided One and Great Baldy looked back and fourth between themselves. 

"It wouldn't take that long! Just warm the horses up, do the routine, and go to wherever we have to go to get them home."

"What about him?" Elli asked looking at Evil Long Hair.

"He'll be awake, these two can handle him for a total of 4:08 minutes can't they??" I whined. 

"Billie…" Elli started. 

"I don't understand, what are you worried about now?" Great Baldy questioned.

"A competition that we've worked extremely hard to get in to." Elli told him regretfully.

Again silence stood. 

"Come on Elli, we have to. Think of the people we'd let down if we didn't go. We have to."

"We don't even have our uniforms B." Elli told me.

"Yes we do, they're at the stable. Remember? I put them in the office." 

At this Elli nodded. 

"I don't know.." 

"Elli, please!" I begged. No way was I letting this go without a fight. 

Elli looked at Braided One and Great Baldy. After a moment she sighed. "Alright, we'll go." 

"YES!" I jumped up.

**Elli:**

For some reason that was probably very apparent…I had a badddd feeling about this.

Tbc…

Well? Sorry we know it wasn't all that great. Thanks for readin' and we'll try and uppy soon! Sorry for the delay!

Till Later,

B&E


	6. Ch 6 Attack of the Obsessive, Spooky Hor...

**Thanks for the reviews!!!!!! Padawan Anika, silverwolfprincess, Drama-Princess87, KnightBathalasar, Harriet, Venus725, DaleJr.luver8, Summer Rose (prev. Nory, Kaeryn, Dragonlet, Padawan Rejects(Erra), Deanna, Laurianna, Maggie V., G. Zan, phoenixqueen, and ihadanepiphany!!!!!!!!!!**

**You guys totally deserve to have indy thank you's on this chapter but we don't have time right now. NEXT CHAPTER WILL!!!!!!!!!!!!! PROMISE! **

**SO sorry for the HUGE wait! Bad writer's block, and we don't like this chapter much anyway. Next one should be interesting. No Great Baldy in Wheel barrel with lunatic 'driving' but somewhere in the mobs and camp snoopy…;) ****Thanks for everything guys! BE PREPARED! Insanity ahead! …and Horses…And Lord help you…Maggie V. is added in for this chapter and the next. Possibly guest starring in others depending on how it goes, HUH MAGGIE?! Lol. ENJOY!**

Ch. 6 Payback a B-

"Hey, I think he's coming back around." I looked back to Billie who was desperately trying to get Evil Long Hair to wake up. 

"B, stop shaking him." I said.

"Oh, sorry." She said looking at Braided One who glanced worriedly at me. I just shrugged.  

It had been 45 minutes since he was initally hit with the dart. We were now at Diamond T, in the office without anyone seeing us cause everyone was in the arena. Needless to say, it was rather difficult to move a 6 foot something passed out guy from Biengie's place to a boat, to a car, and to an office. Biengie was with us but right now he was seeing something about a plane…What? How else did you expect to get us up there to the doorway? No stairs that I can see. Apparently he knew someone, who knew someone, who knew someone, who Billie insisted on saying were fellow canniables.

"Look, keep an eye on him. NOTHING is to happen to him while I'm gone! I'm going to go find Maggie and see what the hell is going on that this place is diserted and see how dead we are." I told Billie.

"You need to say with such force? I got everything covered…" She said coolly. I glared and turned out of the office.

**Billie:**

"I think he's coming around this time Blonde." Great Baldy said.

"Um…K…I dunno what to do about that. Just don't let him get up. Talk to him. No brain damage right?" 

**Elli: **

Not two seconds after I came out of the office I had a 5 inch shorter, curly haired, blonde girl standing infront of me with murder in her eyes. Shoving me up on the wall my good friend Maggie ranted, "Where in the hell have you been?!" 

"Ow! Friggin' A Maggie, back off." I said popping my neck.

Maggie took a deep breath and closed her eyes. I waited for her to count to ten as I knew she was doing. "Ok, let's think about this. You've been missing for the past 5 hours, you were supposed to be here nearly 2 hours ago, I have a rider who decided to go wacky and go home probably kicking his heels together with little glittery shoes, a stallion that won't stop kicking the stalls, and you're telling me to BACK OFF?!"

I winced at this. 

There was a loud crashing noise in the office and a very strange and disturbing laugh. It was kind of like a low but awkwardly pitched giggle.

"Great! Now I have birds in the office -- **_again!" Maggie said going in the door so fast I didn't even have the chance to stop her. Where's a little brown paper bag to breathe in when you need one?_**

**Billie: Few moments prior**

"Master? Are you ok?" Braided One questioned the slowly blinking Jedi Master.

"How many fingers do I have up?" I asked holding my middle finger up. I had to restrain myself from laughing because the three didn't know what I was really doing.

"What?" Evil Long Hair asked in a normal, yet groggy voice. 

"Never mind. Are you ok?" Great Baldy asked.

"I'm fine. What happened?" Evil Long Hair asked trying to put his legs over the side of the sofa. (Yes, there is a sofa in the office. Haha, real professional huh? What? It's a stable!) 

"You were shot by your oh-too-nice apprentice here." I said patting Braided One's shoulder. 

"Why would he do such a thing? You didn't shoot me did you Obi-Wan?" Evil Long Hair asked. His words were beginning to slur now and I was starting to worry.

"Umm..Actually Master…" Braided One said looking down.

"Ha! HAHA!" Evil Long Hair suddenly bellowed.

Great Baldy, Braided One, and I all jerked back in surprise. Evil Long Hair took no attention and continued to try to stand now. Gaining his balance he kind of looked around. 

"Obi-Wan, you look so down. Be happy! Happy, happy!" Evil Long Hair said loudly waving his hands about. This caused him to lose his balance and waver back and fourth. Titter one way, titter the other…Timmmmmmbbbbbbbeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrr!!! Braided One moved forward for the save but this only ended up to have the two crash into the shelf near them and send trophies, glasses, and show plaques shattering down on them.

"Great! Now I have birds in the office -- **_again!" _**

Uh-Oh…… Manic obsessive fan of Braided One now entering. Warning! Warning! Danger Ewan McGregor Look-a-Like Jedi Guy! Danger!

If I could have frozen the look on Maggie Vinis's face just for that one moment I would be so friggin' rich it wouldn't even be funny anymore. 

She came in all mad looking. She looked to me…then beside me to Great Baldy who was moving to help her next to victims. At first, all she saw was Evil Long Hair because Braided One was being crushed under him. Finally when Great Baldy moved Evil Long Hair asside…Hell was to be had.

**"OH! MY! GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" It was the loudest phrase I'd ever heard in my life. Even louder then the time when I saw a spider on my hand two weeks ago.**

**From here on is total Slow Motion…**

Maggie was making her move to jump on Braided One, who was looking at her in total fear and really wide eyes. Suddenly Elli came back from around the corner.

"Maaagggggiiiiieeee…Nooooooooo!!!!" *really mega deep voice there* Elli yelled diving for Maggie as Maggie dove for Braided One. 

In really weird deep voice again and don't forget still slow mo, "Graaaaa….Aaaahhhhh….Ooooaaaaffff….Ooowwwwwwww…" Maggie cried as she and Elli collided and landed a bit away from Braided One. 

**Back to normal speed.**

"Move Braided One! Billie get him away!" Elli shouted trying to keep down the struggling obsessive person trying to get back to him. 

"Let go! Let Go! I must see! Must touch! Must Touch!" Maggie yelled trying to wiggle free of Elli hanging onto her two feet keeping her down as I pulled Braided One up and ushered him to the other side of the room, out of view.

"Mag! Mag stop this! Stop!" Elli shouted as Maggie screamed having Braided One taken out of her vision. 

"What is wrong with her?!" Braided One asked.

"I love you!!!!!!!" Maggie cried. Braided One stepped behind me peering at the crazed demon. 

"No! Maggie, Please!"

"Shouldn't we restrain her or something?" Great Baldy asked trying to keep Evil Long Hair from making little "vooooooommmmmmm" noises and wandering right out of the room.

"Just close the door!" Elli shouted. Great Baldy, being closest, did so and things quieted slightly.

Maggie continued to say things but it was mumbled, much like a crazy person would do. Hmmm…

"Mag, now, I'm going to let go. You have to promise not to attack anyone, ok?" Elli said calmly.

"…Yeah…Yeah, ok." Maggie replied. Slowly Elli let up on her. Without warning Maggie sprang up, kicking Elli in the jaw doing so causing numerous curses from my friend. 

I saw my life flash before my eyes as I watched Maggie turn and rush at us in total slow motion. "Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed, throwing Braided One one way and taking the full tackle on myself. 

**Elli:**

I grimaced seeing Maggie tackle Billie. When they crashed to the ground I pounced on Maggie's one arm and Billie grabbed her other.

"No! Get off of me! Please! Elli, you understand!!! How could you?! YOU UNDERSTAND!"

"I know! I know! I do understand! But Maggie, this isn't McGregor!" 

"Wha?" Maggie said peering behind us to Braided One. "Yes it is!" Again she started into a mad struggle.

"No it's not! Look at him! LOOK!" I shouted.

"OWWWWWWWW! STOP BITING AT ME!" Billie screamed.

"Arrrggghhhhhh!" Maggie literally growled. 

"Arrrrrgghhhhhh!" Evil Long Hair repeated.

"Hey! Liam, help me out here! I gotta get to your co-star there." Maggie said, oblivious that Evil Long Hair was acting looney.

"Who's Liam?" Evil Long Hair asked.

"You!" Maggie shouted.

"HA HA!" Evil Long Hair said taking a glass figurine of a horse on the desk and observing it. 

"Maggie! Look at me!" I shouted glaring at her. Slowly Maggie began to slow her rant then looked at me.

"He is not Ewan McGregor. He is not Liam Neeson. And he is not Samual L. Jackson. Okay? Do you remember that story I let you read a while back? Diff..Er..Umm.." The title slipped my mind.

"Different Reality, right, I know. What's that got to do with anyth-…Hhhhhooohhhhhhh Noooooooo!" She started struggling again and this time when she was free she backed away from the three Jedi. "No, No, No, No, No. You can't tell me that they're..they're…No.." 

"Maggie, you know who they are. They're not going to do anything to you. There's been a mix up." I coaxed.

"MIX UP?!?! THEY'RE HERE!"

"HA HA!" Evil Long Hair exclaimed.

"What's with him?" Maggie asked. 

"He was hit by a tranq dart." Billie provided.

"How'd he get hit with a tranq dart?!" 

"After the polar bear tried to eat us." Great Baldy said.

"Polar Bear?!" 

"Long story. Look, we need to get this competition over with so we can get them home." I said calmly.

"Home?!" Maggie screamed. "Home is a galaxy far, far away! How do you expect to get them home?!" 

"Astronomical door." Billie said.

Maggie was silent a bit. Her eyes tightened then she nodded in kind of a bobbing motion. "..Ok..Where?" 

"About 100 feet above school."

"Above?"

"Yeah, in the air." Billie told her. 

Maggie looked between us really fast like a crazy person then nodded again. "I can help."

"Yes you can. I need you to keep them entertained while we're in the ring and warming up." 

"oh…K…" 

"Can  you do that?" 

"HA HA!" Evil Long Hair exclaimed.

I sighed shaking my head as he looked at those scrambled pictures were you can see another picture in them if you draw away slowly. 

"Yeah." Maggie nodded.

"What are we doing now?" Braided One asked.

"You're staying in this office with Maggie and not coming out until we get back." I told him. 

"Oh, uh, Elli, there's something I didn't get to in my rant." Maggie said lowly.

"What?"

"The rider that went home? Um..It's Toby." She said quietly.

Billie and I did nothing. "He just LEFT?!" Billie screamed suddenly.

"He was getting crazy cause you guys weren't here on time!" 

"GAH!" Billie groaned standing.

"HA HA!" Evil Long Hair exclaimed poking the picture.

"Would you stop that!" Billie shouted. Evil Long Hair looked at her surprised, eyes wide and lips pressed in a line. He looked like a cartoon character that I can't think of for the life of me. 

"Don't yell at him." I said.

"We have to go now or we're not going to get in." Billie said pacing.

"I know. Ok, Maggie, ideas fast." I ordered. Maggie had been with us since the beginning of this riding gig thing. Infact I nicknamed her Gig, part on because once I miss typed her name as Magige and we stuck to gig. 

"Um, obviously you need another rider. Has to be a guy because we can get away saying that whoever it is is Toby cause the judges have never seen him before and no photos are available…But you need to find a guy and teach him what it took you guys 8 months to master…" She said quickly. Apparently she had already been thinking about this.

"Right, smart." Billie said, clearly she too was thinking.

"Who are we going to get though??" I asked. Silence settled. 

I looked at Bille as I saw her stop pacing. Slowly her eyes slid to Braided One and a small smile arrived on her face. 

"No. Absolutely not. We'd have better luck just leaving here." I said quickly.

"Elli…"

"No. You're nuts. He-He doesn't even know how to ride!" 

"Jedi are said to have good balance…" Maggie put in helpfully.

"NO! You are friggin' insane if you think I'm going to sign my name to a paper saying that I put him in this team. No, no, and no." 

"Am I missing something?" Great Baldy asked, forcing Qui-Gon to sit down.

"He'd look good in Toby's uniform." Maggie said, ignoring Great Baldy and studying Braided One who looked nervously at me.

"Stop drooling cause it's a big fat, friggin' impossiblity. It took us 8 months to get this routine down, we can't teach someone who's never riden before in less than an hour!" I snapped standing and pacing. I was vaguely aware of Evil Long Hair taking up pace with me, mocking of course. I tried to hold my temper and ignore him.

"Elli, you need him. No one else is going to be able to do it. Jedi have good memories, good balance, and are attuned to living creatures, you know all this." Maggie continued.

"It doesn't mean I have to accept it!" 

Billie went over to Braided One and sized him up.

"This is the last time I'm saying this—No friggin' way am I going to allow you two to make him get on a horse and do this. Absolutely-"

**15 Minutes Later:**

Sitting on my horse I watched hopelessly as Maggie tried to help Braided One figure out how exactly to get on the big 1200 lbs. quarter horse named Bexley. Billie was beside me on Palbo, her horse.

"_Absolutely not I say. __No I say. I'm such a failure…" I grumbled looking at Great Baldy and Evil Long Hair. Great Baldy was assigned to keep his friend out of trouble while we tended to Braided One who still wasn't sure what the hell he was getting himself into. _

"No, no, swing your leg over his back not infront of you." Maggie said as Braided One fell off. 

"He'll get it." Billie said assuringly. 

"You're going to get it in a minute!" I said moving Loxley, Bexley's brother, in order to hit her. 

"Eek!" Billie exclaimed, trotting away towards Great Baldy and Evil Long Hair. 

**Billie:**

"Hey, hey!" 

"Hello, Hello!" Evil Long Hair replied cheerily.

"Yo, Yo!"

"Hi, Hi!"

"Howdy, Howdy!"  
"Greetings, Greetings!" 

I thought a moment. "Ok, you win."

"Woo-Hoo!" Evil Long Hair exclaimed throwing his arms up in victory. Surprisingly enough I liked the drugged Evil Long Hair better than the other adulty one. Lol. 

"Perhaps we should get you two a couple horses so you don't look so out of place." I thought aloud.

"Billie!" Elli shouted.

"Easy Danielle Ann! I was just thinking." I purposely used her full name just to get on her nerves.

"Can it. No more thinking for you." Elli said as Maggie led an uneasy Braided One around on Bex.

"Man, someone's grumpy." I murmured looking back to Evil Long Hair…Who had suddenly gone missing. "Uh…"

I glanced over my shoulder to make sure Elli wasn't looking. She was busy showing Braided One how to position himself properly.

"Great Baldy, where's the Evil Long Hair????!" I whispered.

Great Baldy turned around from looking in a stall to find the spot where his friend was vacant.

"You were talking to him!" He hissed back. 

"I looked away for two seconds!" I replied.

"So did I Nit-Wit, how do you think he got away without anyone noticing?!" Great Baldy fumed. 

"B, we're going to the east practice arena, coming?" Elli called.

"Uh..Yeah!" I called back. "Find him! I'll get Maggie to help you." I whispered turning Palbo away and trotting to Maggie who was behind Elli and Braided One. "Go help Great Baldy." I said.

"Who?"

"Jackson dude. He lost Neeson dude!" I whispered. Maggie's eyes instantly grew in size by a full half.

"WHAT?!" She shouted. This caused my horse to freak out and take off after Elli and Braided One. That was the last I saw of Maggie.

**Elli:**

"Heels down. There." I instructed as I led Bexley towards the practice arena. 

"This is sort of like riding mukans." Braided One said seeming to relax.

"Umm..Yeah." I said, not knowing what the hell he was talking about. "Think of it that way." I looked up suddenly and guess who I happened to see?? Melissa Barton on her little pony ass palomino.  Suddenly I realized she was looking right to Braided One.

"Get-up!" I shouted smacking Bexley on the butt. He hardly flinched. "Oh, come on, it works in the movies!" I whined. 

"HAHA!" 

_Oh dear Lord have mercy on me for I have sinned in my life, and I know You're punishing me now because no person of purity would deserve such a fate as You are giving me now. _

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Braided One cried as Evil Long Hair suddenly leapt onto Bexley's back. Bexley, the laid back horse that he was, who wouldn't even go when he was supposed to, spooked badly and reared up. Amazingly enough both Jedi stayed on and the last thing I saw of them were their backs as they raced off.

My eyes slowly slid back to Billie who looked like she was about to have a heart attack and was deathly pale. Maggie was behind her dying in a fit of laughter. Great Baldy was behind her looking utterly shocked and annoyed at the same time.

"You're all DEAD when they get back!" I shouted. "Maggie, get a horse for Great Baldy and yourself. Billie, come on!" The three scattered.

**_Braided One: (We tried to get what would 'sound like him' cause he doesn't think a thing like we do…or so we think…lol! We tried!)_**

_Oh My Sweet Force we're going to die!_

"MASTER! Stop yelling!" I shouted over my normally stotic, calm, and composed Master.

"What was that Obi-Wan?!" He shouted back.

"Stop Yelling Please!" I shouted back.

"OH! OK!" He replied. "Erm, ok." He whispered. When does that drug wear off?????

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! Stop! Stop Animal, Creature, Being! Stop!" I exclaimed seeing that the …thing..horse did they call it?, was running right towards a fence. "Stop!" I pulled on the leather things in my hands but there was no tension, too much slack, and nothing happened.

"Isn't this fun Padawan?" Master said loudly. 

"Master, come to your senses for just two minutes please! We're going to die!" I shouted watching the fence come closer and closer.

"WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE! ..In Mace's words." Master Qui-Gon said merrily.

"Hang On!" I said squeezing my eyes shut. 

It was a strange feeling really. Suddenly the weight of the air pressed on you then it felt like you were falling, gliding almost. Master continued to rant in "Woo-Hoo" "Weeeeeee!" and various other things. I simply waited for the ground to come up. And it did rather abrutly. The animal landed soundly, but this caused Master Qui-Gon and I to jult forward the tip back as the beast pushed off into another high speed with his back quarters making it lurch off the ground yet again.

"Master, are you ok?!" I yelled over the animal's loud hooves and the wind.

"Bumpy ride!" He replied loudly. "Look Obi-Wan, no hands!" He flung his arms out suddenly. 

"No, No! No flying." I said an his hands dropped again to my shoulders. 

"Where are we going?" He asked.

"Where ever this thing wants to go…" I replied.

**Maggie:**

"Oh gosh…Oh gosh…Oh gosh.." I hardly realized what I was repeating over and over again as I made record time saddling two horses. I was able to get one of the most laid back horses for Great Baldy. Nicky. I in turn got Elli's other high strung horse Broot. What kind of name is that? 

"K, hurrry and get on before we can't find them anymore." I said holding the stirrup out. Great Baldy looked at the stirrup then at me. 

"Urgh, put your foot in there and grab here-" I shook the saddle's front, " and pull yourself on. Ok?"

Great Baldy looked around then shrugged doing so quite effortlessly. 

"Good, maybe you won't die." I said under my breath. 

"What?"

"Nothing." I replied quickly getting on Broot, who made an annoyed sound. He didn't like anyone BUT Elli. He especially didn't like Billie for some reason. Anyway…

"Come on." I said getting into a lope right off the bat. Great Baldy was supposed to have good balance right? 

"Ah h h h h h h h h h h h h h h h h…" Great Baldy groaned as Nicky trotted behind me. Ok, maybe she was a bit too laid back… 

**Billie:**

"Fence!" I shouted at Elli who was leaned down trying to fix her stirrup. 

"Crrrrrruuuuuddd!" She exclaimed finally fixing the stirrup and sitting back up. 

Jumping was what we did, and if I must say so myself, we did a damn good job at it. Clearing the fence with no problem I sort of wondered how Braided One and Evil Long Hair cleared it with two on Bexley who wasn't even a jumping horse. 

"After this, I'm tying them all, including you!, to chairs and throw them into the doorway." Elli shouted after the landing. 

"Well, at least Great Baldy won't be able to kill me!" I shouted back.

"I'll let him do that first!" I said. 

We followed the dust trails still thrown up by Bexley. He was a big horse and he couldn't move as fast as Loxley could at all. Palbo was a speed demon, but he was a blind speed demon. If he start at full speed, you better not be planning on stopping any time soon.

"Please tell me they did NOT go onto the trails!" Elli shouted as we started down the hill towards the guest trails. 

"Oh God help them and those poor people." I murmured. Bexley was going to freak out seeing bikes, four wheelers, and other things. He was a horsey horse. There were different trails for horses and horses only. This wasn't one of them…

tbc…

*Grins* Hmm..It wasn't all that funny, but we're working on getting you to laugh in the next on. Hahahah! Hope you still liked! Again, we're sorry for the wait! Hopefully this writer's block will go away for both of us! Maggie, I'm looking at you for help for the next chapter. *glares* otherwise I'll do mean things to you! Hahah! I will anyway! = - D 

Till Later,

E&B


	7. Ch 7 Tea, Mrs Nespice, and Cheers

**Thanks all for the reviews!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JediKnightBalthasar (NO! We love everyone who reviews, especially so often! Great quote, lol. Sorry about any errors, we often don't have time to beta/proof read, please forgive the mistakes. Thanks again!) ****Kaeryn (Glad you liked that part of the druggie Jedi..haha, you haven't seen it all though. We're so mean it's like not even funny..well, we hope it is though..haha. Heh, we liked that part on Obi-Wan too. Enjoy this chapter!) ****Dragonlet ( Happy that you liked it! SORRY FOR MAKING YOU WAIT! It's been almost a month, we know! URGH! Anyhew, we hope this is worth the wait! Enjoy!) ****Padawan Rejects ( Lol, we didn't quite think of it that way- so in a way I guess that chapter wasn't so terribly bad! I'd love to see that in real life though, wouldn't you? Haha! Poor maggie…she suffers from what many do..Ewan McGregor Obsessive Syndrome. ;) ) ****Maggie V. ( You're such a dork. Haha, thanks for your ideas for this one, hehehehhe…Mrs. Nespice..Shaft..and cherries to come.. :D) ****Chinow (Oh, hahah! I totally know the feeling! I do that sometimes too! The ESC key is a God sent! It's saved my butt so many times I can't even count. Yes, yes, DIE WRITER'S BLOCK! Lol. ) ****Andy (Hope this one is good/humerous too!!!!!) ****ihadanenpiphany ( Glad you thought it was good! Hope you're feeling better, and we hope this one is somewhat decent as well! Happy reading!) ****Venus725 (2 times! Woo-hoo!  Sorry we had to make you do that though. It shouldn't take so long that you guys have to email and review to tell us to update. Terribly sorry about that. Yay! You fell out of your chair! WOO-HOO! So glad! Hope you do this time too, but I highly doubt. Happy reading to you too!) ****Greesha (Welcome aboard my friend! Hope you're still liking this and will stick around. Enjoy!)**

_Sorry for the wait guys! Explaination at the bottom! We're really sorry about the wait. We're hoping, though doubting, that this is worth it. It might be though, we're kinda proud of one of the ideas in here and it's thanks to Maggie, way to go Margie! ;) Enjoy guys, and I really hope to update again soon. Maggie, I'm looking for you to help again! Haha!_

Sorry for any errors in this chapter, there prolly will be quite a few, it's late and we don't have time to reread it again. Gah, it's long! Haha, oh yeah, if you don't know the Cheers* theme, you're gonna miss out on something. Happy reading!

**_Ch. 7 Payback's a Bi-_**

**Obi-Wan:**

"Easy creature! Calm down!" I tried to calm the animal racing past the trees and vegetation around us but he kept speeding along the cleared path. 

"Wow, look at that Padawan." My master said.

"Look at what?" I said seeing nothing around us.

"That." He said pointing to some strange transport on wheels…Looked something like what did she call them? Cars? But not really. Maybe they were speeder cars! 

Suddenly it dawned on me that maybe that thing coming so fast at us, and us going so fast at them, wasn't the brightest of things to happen. 

"This is going to hurt…" It was then when I heard a lot of yelling…and more of that pounding sound of the creature below us.

**Maggie:**

I couldn't help it really. It was just way too funny. It was one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life. Great Baldy had absolutely no balance on a horse. He was helplessly clinging to Nicky's neck bouncing along with her trot. I should be helping him balance really, but this was just TOO funny. 

"Sto-hop laugh-fing." He told me. He sounded slightly irriated. 

"Sorry." I said but still laughed unable to controll myself. 

"Wher-Air are th-lay?!" He said loudly.

"I dunno. That's the point of this whole expedition, dur." I told him. He glared. Oo, he's mean lookin'. I thought he was supposed to be nice or something? Personally, I thought Evil Long Hair was great when he was drugged out. That too was one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Wow, these guys have got to come around more often. 

"Hey, where are you going?" I asked as Nicky suddenly stopped and turned around.

"I don't know!" He shouted back.

Nicky started trotting back again at a little quicker pace than what she was just doing. It was then when I realized something…Maybe there was a reason why I set a record for saddling a horse cause I don't think the saddle is tight enough. Nope it's definitely not. This I conclude as Great Baldy gradually starts to lean one way and slide down.

"Hey! Is this supposed to happen?!" He shouted as he was almost totally around Nicky's neck. 

"Um…" 

**Obi-Wan:**

To be frank and to the point, I didn't quite realize what had happened before my mind registered a fair amount of pain. Actually, A LOT of pain. It was then, when I was looking up through the trees, did I know that- yes, I was on the ground. And yes I did have the creature in which I had ridden in a mad frenzy however long ago blowing air on my face. Finally it all came back to me…this when the creature sneezed..

I hadn't known what to do with the weird mini speeder things were coming from a side trail at us. I had no control over the creature dominating our lives and my master just..had no control whatsoever. I believe I heard him humming a crèche melody while I awaited death to come…and Force did it come.

The speeder things obviously did not see us or something because they shot off their trail in a burst of dust and leaves RIGHT infront of us. Not even a full yard infront of us. The creature made a strange sound and threw himself up on his hind legs while spinning extremely fast. You wouldn't think that a creature of that size could do that! The next thing I knew was the blissfull feeling of flying through the air and the dread of landing. I also recall hearing my Master exclaiming in a jolly voice, "Weeeeeeee!!!!!!!" and I believe there was a thud, sticks snapping and a splash..That's all I know and I'm sticking to it—Now would someone please get this creature away from my face so I can pass out again?

"Braided One!" 

Umm..Someone besides the blonde perhaps?...

"Don't move!" 

Does it really look like it red head??? By the Will, you'd think that the Force would send some decent aide along for one of it's most faithful servents! …Where was Master again? 

---Blackness.

**Elli: **

Loxley stopped on record time and I broke my own record for getting off of him as Braided One suddenly went limp again. He was looking around just a second ago.

"Is he dead?!" Billie asked trying to get Palbo to actually stop.

"Don't say that! Gah! You don't understand what he does for the other universe, if we kill him that universe is shot!" I told her dropping next to the Jedi. Luckily for me and that galaxy far, far away he was breathing.

"HE LIVES!" I shouted throwing my arms up in victory.

"Whew, that's good.." Billie said non-enthusiastically. "Hey..Where's Evil Long Hair??" 

At this question, seemingly so innocent in nature, I died. Yep, me. I died. Flopped out right there, claimed by the night. Reason for death? Three Jedi, two blondes, and a galaxy far, far away…

**Meanwhile, elsewhere… _(We couldn't really go into Evil Long Hair's mind because he's like all drugged out and all. Unless you guys want to read a bunch of mixed up crap, we gotta do it this way. Lol..though that would have been interesting..)_**

"Oh, look at the frog.." Evil Long Hair observed the tiny creature sitting on his chest in the 4 inch deep water down the slope off the trail.

The frog looked back at the Jedi and blinked it's wide eyes one time replying, "..Er-Ribit."

"My thoughts exactly." Evil Long Hair told him patting his little head. 

"Hi!" 

At this tiny little voice Evil Long Hair could have sworn that the frog's eyes got even wider and his mouth gaped. He also thought he heard him say, "Er-Runib." just before he hopped off the big Jedi's chest and into the water again.

Evil Long Hair turned his head to look at the source of the voice. He found a young girl standing a few feet away in strange attire. A large bowing hat, pink dress, and white shoes…over jeans and a t-shirt.

"Greetings, greetings." (*winks at Maggie*) He said.

"MymomtoldmenottotalktostrangersbutIneverlistenorsaysmydadsoI'mjustgoingtotalktoyouanywaycausemom'snothere—andIneedanotherfriend." She said seemingly in one breath.

This took a moment for the wacked out Jedi to translate..and he couldn't even do that. So he took up what Obi-Wan often suggested to do whenever Mace had a weird idea..Just smile and nod, while slowly backing away. The problem was he couldn't back away without it being noticable. Odd…things were starting to make sense again.

"Doyouliketeaparties?????"

**Maggie:**

"Who is the man?...-Shaft!" I was beginning to think that Great Baldy didn't like me. He was giving me a weird look. 

After a futile attempt at trying to get the saddle re-adjusted from the side I was now thinking as Great Baldy hung from the side of the old mare, who stood patiently waiting for him to lett go of her neck and unwrap his legs from her stomach and back.

"Would you mind just getting me OFF this thing!" He shouted.

"No need for anger here..just be calm. I should have brought some inscents out here..that would calm you right down."

"Girl, I swear to you if my life did not lie in your hands they would be around your neck!" He growled.

"I thought Jedi were supposed to be nice and understanding..Not violent. Sheesh!" I said currently unstrapping various things.

"I. AM. NOT. VIOLENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Great Baldy shouted. At this moment I unstrapped the grith and let the saddle fall, dragging him with it. He landed with a thud on the ground beside Nicky. She looked at him, then walked off towards the grass.

"Hang on..Oh, I'm sorry, was that too late?" Didn't Elli say something about if he started to chitter stuff to himself that I may want to go for cover? Or was that just my instincts speaking? You know..he kind of sounded like a rabid chipmonk! 

"Have you had rabies shots in your lifetime?" 

"Do I even want to know what those are?" He growled.

At this I became rather silent. "Perhaps, I'll explain some other time. Let me help you, k?" Gingerly I pulled the saddle off of him and helped him up. Honestly, you'd think he was 70 years old! He grunted and groaned the whole time. 

"Omia nu cofia.." (Thinks something that should be censored relating to crazy blonde haired girls.) 

"What was that?" I questioned.

"Nothing." Great Baldy replied. "Now what?" 

**Billie:**

"What was the last thing you remember?" I asked Braided One as he looked around as we sat him on a near by picnic table.

"Red telling me not to move." He replied honestly.

"Urgh..I mean like..Anything that may lead to finding out where Evil Long Hair is?"

"Umm…Lemme think..Thud..twig snap, twig snap..twig snap.."

Elli and I glanced at eachother and she just shrugged. 

"..twig snap..twig snap.."

Anyone got a newpaper? Hey who one last night at the summer high school?

"..twig snap..uh.."

"Let me guess, twig snap?!" I shouted. I'm not a very patient person in all honesty.

"Noo..Splash. There was water!" He said victoriously.

"Good! Good! Water is good. It gives us a place." Elli said pacing around in thought.

"But..What if he landed face down and drowned?"

"Billie!" Elli shouted.

"Sorry..just trying to state the obvious question if he's dead or not."

"And you say everyone else is obsessed with death!" She shouted again.

Braided One and I glanced eachother and he nodded a little as in she was right.

"Oh shut up, what good are you." I said plopping down next to him.

"Alright, before anything, I've got to get this out of the way. I've put it off for too long now and I'm going to forget in this frenzy of crap going on around here." Elli said walking to the table and sitting on it turning to face Braided One.

"Billie, see if you can find Evil Long Hair. He probably went down the slope and into the Twin Creeks. Check around there, he can't be hard to miss. See if you can find Maggie too."

"But I wanna hear!" I said. Honestly I did. I like to know what's going on ok? Is that so wrong?

"It's about everything I know about Star Wars."

"I'm going." I said bolting off the table. No. Frickin'. Way. Was I going to stay and listen to that. Like I know what the heck she's talking about with the Force, and Jedi, and some place call Cournastant…Or was it Corusan…Coriester?? Umm…

**Elli:**

I watched Billie go knowing she was thinking of something because she had the scary look about her when she was trying to think of something. Looking back to Braided One I was really dreading this. I was hoping to tell Evil Long Hair, but that obviously won't work. Great Baldy is…unstable in this universe and may kill me for Lord knows what reason.

"You're not going to like this.."

"I often don't like much of what you tell me..Including a creature called a ..horse?" He said with a nervous smile. Was he trying to lighten the mood? Man, I must look really serious or something…Eh…

"In about 5 years.."

**Evil Long Hair: (Small segment.)**

_Is pink my color or aqua??...Hmm…Ooo! Yellow!_

**Maggie:**

"Really, in all honesty, you must know this song. Now, follow me…"

"No, I will not subject myself to this type of torment. I'm just here to find my friend who is drugged out, and get the hell out of here." Great Baldy refused shaking his head quickly.

"You're no fun." I said. Nicky and Broot were out in pasture, I saw no need to force Great Baldy onto another horse ten times as high strung as the last with me. _No thank you, I'll pass I believe were his exact words. I had no argument._

"Maggie!" 

Turning I saw Billie running for us.

"Billie, where's Elli and the others?"

"Elli is giving Braided One _the news…and Evil Long Hair has been lost again."_

"How do you lose a 6'4" guy! And yes, I realize I'm asking this again! And another thing, what's _the news??"_

"I don't know, he's easy to lose. And yes, I caught that too. And the news is.." Billie coughed and leaned forward whispering without moving her mouth something I couldn't understand.

"What?"

Again, murmur, murmur.

"Huh?"

"I said!" Un-understandable speech here.

"Say it again?"

"I SAID THE NEWS ABOUT WHEN EVERYONE DIES HORRORABLE DEATHS BECAUSE OF SOMEONE ELLI CALLS THE BRATTED ONE!!!!!!!" Billie shouted at the top of her lungs. 

I looked to Great Baldy. "Oh…You should have just whispered it." I said.

"Hmm? What?" Great Baldy said totally oblivious to what had just occurred, much to our advantage and luck.

"GAH!" Billie exclaimed and began to rant in rather vigious cuss words.

"Shh..Listen." Great Baldy said suddenly.

We all fell silent and after a moment we heard it too. Voices..Humming..and talking. A young girl's voice. 

"Would you like some more tea Mrs. Nespice??" **( Name and Character created by and for Toy Story, we don't own the idea or the character plot..but damn is it funny to know what we're doing with it. If anyone doesn't know or hasn't seen the movie, haha, you'll be extremely confused. For those who have seen the movie but can't remember, it's when Buzz is like in a mid-toy crisis and he freaks out and goes with the girls. Yes, that was Maggie's idea. Hahah!) **

"It's just a kid playing tea part-" Billie started but stopped when the reply came, which she didn't recognize but Great Baldy did.

"Please." That was a strange voice…

"That's Qui-Gon."

"Huh? How can you tell?" I asked as we ran after the sudden fleeing Jedi.

"He once inhaled Obi-Wan's science project, it was a type of gas and it made his voice sound…different."

"He means feminine." Billie whispered as we stopped behind some brush near him.

"I gathered that genius!" I hissed back.

"Well..I know how you are…" Billie replied with a grin.

"Shh!" Great Baldy shushed us and turned back to slowly open a gap in the brush to peer through.

"Oh my Frickin' burning hell…" Billie said quietly.

**Elli:**

"Oh my frickin' burning hell..You don't know what the heck I just said do you?"

Over the last 7 to 10 minutes I had explained about everything I knew about the death of the Jedi, the birth of the Empire, the years before and in between, and the fall of the Empire to Obi-Wan Kenobi. The most key player in the entire thing. He had stayed silent the entire time without even a movement. I figured it was because he was in shock…apparently not. 

After I had finished my essay speech I allowed him to think on it..After like 5 minutes he suddenly said, "What was it you wanted to tell me?"

"Ah..You said you had to tell me something that I wouldn't like. What is it?"

It was then when I thought perhaps Qui-Gon was right..Everything happens for a reason. And him along with a bunch of other people I've read in books, seen in movies, and heard on tv talk about time travel or whatever when they say that no matter what we do to change whatever we want changed, it never will be. It must happen. I just poured everything I knew about Obi-wan Kenobi's life and fall and he hadn't heard a thing I'd said. Or he did, but he just didn't remember.

"I can't do it." I said.

Braided One frowned, "Do what? You look faint you know, are you alright?"

With a sigh I resigned to my other choice. 

"..I'm fine." I grumbled.

"You do that often you know. I can obviously tell that you're not fine and yet you say that you are and it's an unhealthy habit that you seem to have picked up somewh-"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

In shock, we both looked West.

"That was Master Mace." Braided One said. This I already knew.

"Now what?!" I moaned.

**Few Moments Before- Billie:**

As Great Baldy parted the brush's branches all of us gazed at a sight that no one should ever have to see in one's lifetime. There Evil Long Hair sat at a tiny little PlaySchool plastic table with a little girl to his left and two dolls to his front and right. That wasn't the worst part, nor was the little tea set on the table. No those were little things really…It was the hat and shreaded fabric around his neck and shoulders that was the worst of it all. That was just something that should not be done.

"I can't believe it…He's gone totally out of it!" Maggie exclaimed in a whisper.

"Well- Yeah!" I replied knocking her on the side of the head just to see if anything was in there. 

"Ow, don't do that." She said rubbing the side of her head.

Finally I realized that Great Baldy had not moved. He was still as a statue staring at his fellow Jedi. 

"Great Baldy?"

"I can't believe this..This world has done..horrible, horrible things." He murmured. "Things that should not even be spoken of!" 

"Great Baldy, I think you should come to terms that Evil Long Hair is now lost..He cannot return the same man that he was.." I said gingerly placing a hand on his shoulder. For a moment it looked as though he was going to succomb to my plea..but suddenly he tensed and started breathing really heavy.

"Uh-oh…That can't be good." Maggie said as I backed away from him.

"Stay a good distance back..He bites." I told her. Maggie moved wisely back.

Great Baldy took a deep breath.

"Oh boy…" The_ times of a sane Great Baldy flashed through my mind_

***Cut, roll the Cheers Theme---***

**Sometimes you want to go  
Where everybody knows your name,  
And they're always glad you came;  
You want to be where you can see,  
Our troubles are all the same;  
****You want to be where everybody knows your name. **

_..When I accidently hit him with my car…Great Baldy plastered to the jumpy thing at __Camp__Snoopy__.._

**Roll out of bed, Mr. Coffee's dead;  
The morning's looking bright;  
And your shrink ran off to Europe,  
And didn't even write;  
And your husband wants to be a girl; __**

_When he was trying to prevent me from murdering the Sychophant..Yelling at me in __Prior__Lake__..___

**Be glad there's one place in the world  
Where everybody knows your name,  
And they're always glad you came;  
You want to go where people know,  
People are all the same;  
You want to go where everybody knows your name. **

_When Evil Long Hair had him in a nuse lock to keep him from strangling me after I had tried to kill him thinking he was Swamp Man…Those were the good times.          _

**Where everybody knows your name,  
And they're always glad you came;  
Where everybody knows your name,  
And they're always glad you came;  
(fade out)** *****

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

With this he burst into the open area yelling, "What did you do to him you Sith Apprentice?!" I kind of felt sorry for the little girl, but she just glared.

"He's not a he!"

"I'm Mrs. Nespice!" Evil Long Hair greeted. "Tea?"

Braided One and Elli picked this moment to run into the middle of maddness.

"Master?!" Braided One questioned in shock. I thought he was going to pass out again.

"Who? No, no- Mrs. Nespice." He then winked at Braided One 'whispering', "It's really me Obi-Wan." 

"Someone just shoot me!" Elli exclaimed.

"Qui-Gon Jinn! SNAP OUT OF IT!" Great Baldy demanded.

I think that even though I had driven him insane initally, seeing his best friend in a flower hat and what was once a dress blew the rest of any shreads of a normal man to the wind.

"I'm MRS. NESPICE!" Evil Long Hair stood. "See the hat?!" He pointed to the hat. "MRS. NESPICE!" 

"Master, no. You're Qui-Gon Jinn."

"Evil Long Hair." Elli and I pitched in.

"Yeah..what they said." Maggie supplied receiving four glares back at her. "Sor-Ry." She grumbled.

"You're interrupting our tea party." The little girl said impatiently.

"Quiet!" We all shouted at her.

"I'm telling my mommy!"   
"Fine, go! We. Don't. Care!" Ok it was mean, but I had to say it. I can't handle little kids, they drive me nuts.

"MEANIE!" She shouted back.

"BRAT!" I shouted back.

"WHORE!" She screamed.

"Watch your tongue!" 'Mrs. Nespice' scolded.

"Shut up Mrs. Nespice, you're not even real!" She yelled back and suddenly stomped off. How did she get out here anyway? This was a trail wood, not a residential. Oh well..Maybe Murry's little friend is around somewhere. Murry, want a treat?? Here boy!

"Qui-Gon, take off the hat."

"No, it's mine." Evil Long Hair said. I swear, he was getting worse, not better with that drug thing.

"Master.."

"No!" 

"Evil Long Hair.." Elli, Maggie, and I said together.

"NO!" He clamped his hands over his head.

The 5 of us looked at eachother.

"Then you leave us no other choice." Elli said seriously.

Evil Long Hair looked between all of us nervously. 

"GET-"

In that one instant we all saw it happen. He changed. His posture, his expression, everything changed in just that one instant…but it was just too late. Mrs. Nespice had returned to the Real Qui-Gon Jinn/Evil Long Hair just one second too late.

"HIM!" Great Baldy ordered. With this, Evil Long Hair was pounced on by 5 different people and his call of, "Wait, no, it's me!" was muffled in the herd desperate people..

20 seconds later our job was done. The purple hat had been torn to shreads, and the yellow already shreaded dress was ripped to pieces. We all stood and looked down at the man who had returned. 

He looked at us each in turn then said slowly, "Are you deaf?!?!?!?!" 

"Wait, it's Evil Long Hair this time…Oh, I'm sorry was that too late?" Maggie said meekly.

Elli looked at her then to Evil Long Hair as Great Baldy and Braided One helped him up. 

"We're going back to the stables." She said.

As we walked in silence Evil Long Hair suddenly said, "We are to never speak of what happened today again."

"I don't know, maybe you should consider turning your woredrobe yellow." I told him with a grin. For this I received a smack in the back of the head from Maggie…then another from Elli.

Tbc…

Hahahah! Again, like we said, SORRY FOR THE WAITTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've been in and out of town and state and I'm really sorry. I hope the chapter was somewhat worth it though…maybe? Hopefully? Probably not? Urgh..Anyhew, hope you guys are still like this! Only a few more chapters left! :D

Till Later,

B&E

P.S. The Cheers theme of course does not belong to us but oh deary me, that was so funny to put in there!!!!! (And yes, we didn't put the whole thing in there.)  Was it stupid or was it funny? We can never tell! Hah! Till later- Cheers!

P.S.S. Some of you are prolly wondering about the anti-tranq thing that SUDDENLY kicked in. I talked to Biengie (It's said Bin-Gie. Someone mentioned that some time ago.) and he said that really happens with the stuff he uses. Just all of a sudden BANG they're back to normal. Usually right after they really go off the deep end. Ok, now I'll let you go. Don't forget to review please! :-D


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